This query is part of the Be an Agent for a Day contest. Rules and Regulations here
Please post your rejection or manuscript request in the comment section!
Dear Agent for a Day:
There is nothing in the galaxy Akila wants more than the oblivion of her next sed-pinch. Hiding out on P-4 should have been enough to keep Contact from finding her, but when she’s caught her beating the crap out of her remedy supplier, she’s hauled off to CS-1 with other criminals to be reformed by the military. Its just her luck that when they run her DNA her previous service with Contact and a rare ability to speak Ceph show up.
If Akila thought failing both her physical and mental fitness tests were going to get her out of another mind-raping tour she was wrong. She’s thrown on a Navigation ship with a unit of troopers headed for Ceph space because the idiots think the Cephs can be reasoned with. Akila’s limited to transit time to convince her commanding officer that entering the Ceph’s side of the galaxy will start the Second Interspecies War. Which is something she can’t face sober.
Based on your enthusiasm and professionalism I have chosen to submit my first novel, LONG SHOT LOST an 84,000 word work of science fiction to you.
Thank you for your time.
Best,
Author
STATS: 4% request rate
Rebecca Knight says
Dear Long Shot Lost,
Thank you for your query, and for thinking of my agency. Unfortunately, I feel that I’m not the best fit for your project. This industry is highly subjective, so I’m sure others will feel differently. Best of luck to you in all your endeavors.
Sincerely,
Rebecca Knight
Janine says
Thank you for your query, but I am not the right agent for this. Best of luck.
Alisa says
No, thank you.
Alisa.
Shannon says
Dear Author,
Thank you for submitting your query for LONG SHOT LOST for review. Unfortunately, I am not the right person to represent this story. This is a subjective business so another agent may feel differently. Good luck.
Sincerely,
Shannon
Annie Reynolds says
Dear author
Thank you for taking the time to submit your query to the A.F. A.D. agency. Unfortunately I do not believe your novel is a good fit at this time, but please remember that this is a very subjective industry, so keep trying.
Good luck with your career.
Yours truly,
Annie Reynolds.
Aisling says
Dear Author,
I am sorry to inform you that I am not interested in your book. It does not fit with what I am looking for right now so I regret to tell you that, although I appreciated you sending me your query, I would not like to represent your work. I wish you the best of luck with your future writing!
Aisling
Anonymous says
Dear Author,
I’m sorry, but this story is not right for me. Thanks for sending me your request, I really appreciate it. Please continue writing.
Veronica Lovette
Anonymous says
Dear Author,
I didn’t like it. Try again later.
Backdoor Trojan
Mega says
I thank you for sending me your query but it isn’t right for me at this time.
-MV
Anonymous says
I appreciate you sending me this, but I’m going to pass.
S. Pancake
Anonymous says
Dear Pursuing Author,
After reviewing your query, I feel that what you have presented to us is just not going to fly in our market right now. Sorry but keep up the good work.
Sincerely,
Pepe Habanera
Anonymous says
Dear writer,
I appreciate the query but your book is not what I am looking for at the moment. However, I wish you luck in getting this book published.
Best regards,
Nathaniel Orange
Asherose says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your submission, but it isn’t for me at this time. Best of luck with it elsewhere!
Agent
Reasoning: While I would accept jargon in the actual manuscript, where I could depend on context to explain it, I felt that it made the query too hard to understand. I did not feel any attachment to the character. Good query structure, well written blurb.
Anonymous says
Dear Author,
I appreciate your time and efforts, but I am sorry to say that I do not wish to represent your story. If you have another story idea, please send it to me in the future, and I would be happy to look at it.
Best Wishes,
Quintus Blackburn
drat says
Dear Author,
Thank you for sending me your query!
I am intersted in your premise, so if you would please forward your first three chapters, in addition to the last chapter, I would love to take a longer look.
Thanks, I look forward to speaking with you further about your novel!
SDC
Anonymous says
Dear Author,
Thank you for the submission, but I regret to inform you that I will not be picking up your story.
Keep Writing,
Agent Jackie Moon
Anonymous says
Dear author,
I appreciate your query and found your concept interesting; however, it is just not what I am looking for. I look forward to future queries from you!
Thank you, Scarlett Cyrus
Anonymous says
Dear Author,
I am not interested in your novel. Keep writing, your story had potential but was not for me. Feel free to Query me later with another piece of your work.
Anonymous says
Dear Author,
I have decided not to take up your offer on publishing this book. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to view your material.
Thank You,
Happy Gilmore
Anonymous says
Dear Author,
I regret to inform you that I am not interested in representing your story. I hope you have better luck in the future.
Best of luck,
Arkham
Katalina Marie says
Dear Author,
I’m sorry but I don’t think that this book is the one for me.
Regards,
Katalina Marie
LateInTheGame says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query. Unfortunately, I am not the best representative for your work.
Good luck in your search for representation.
All the best,
Agent LateInTheGame
Gryph says
Dear Author,
Thank you very much for your query. While I appreciate the time and effort you’ve put into your work, I don’t believe this is a good fit for me.
Please remember that what doesn’t fit one agent may well fit another! I encourage you to not give up. In the future, if you have other manuscripts to query, I hope that you’ll think of me again.
Sincerely,
Agent Gryph
Reba says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query. Unfortunately, it is not the right fit for me.
Best,
Reba
Kate H says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query. I’m afraid I’m not the right agent to represent you, but I wish you the best of luck.
Kate H
s.koncilja says
Dear Author,
I received and read your query. Unfortunately it is not something that I’m looking for at the moment.
Keep me informed about your future work and good luck!
Agent S.K.
superwench83 says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, your manuscript isn’t right for me. Best wishes in your search for an agent.
Sincerely,
Agent for a Day
publishingcareer says
Dear Author
Thank you for your interest in our agency and submitting your query for your novel LONG SHOT LOST.
I read it with interest but unfortunately it is not what I am looking for.
Best of luck and kind regards.
Yours faithfully
Robert Sullivan AFAD
Nikki Hensley says
Dear Author:
Thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, I don’t think I am the right agent for this novel. Best of luck in your search!
Agent Nikki
SuzieQ Agent4U says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query. Unfortunately, I don’t feel that your story is right for me.
Best,
S
PCB says
Dear Author,
Thank you for submitting your query. We are not in a position to represent you at this time, but wish you all the very best in your writing endeavors.
Sincerely,
PCB
I would suggest leaving a term like “mind-raping” out of a query letter unless it really sells the voice (I don’t think it’s necessary here).
Melissa says
Form rejection:
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query. Unfortunately it doesn’t meet my needs at this time.
Thank you and best of luck,
Melissa (Ximera)
Dave says
Sorry, but I’m going to have to pass. Don’t give up though!
Jenn S. says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query. It’s not right for me, but please keep me in mind for future submissions.
Regards,
Jenn S.
(Reason: Too much jargon interfered with the sketch of the plot/character. I suggest reworking the query. So does my word verification: “revisive.”)
vicariousrising says
Thank you for your submission. Please send me the first three chapters of your book and a 2-3 page synopsis. I look forward to having the opportunity to review your work.
Kendra says
Dear Author,
Thank you for submitting your work. Unfortunately, this is not a project I feel I can sucessfully represent. Good luck in your writing.
Kendra
Hildegarde512 says
Thank you for submitting however [If I were a real agent, a GENTLE FORM REJECTION would exist here].
Hallie says
Dear Author,
Thank you for submitting your query to My Imaginary Yet Successful Literary Agency. I receive many queries each day, and I request only a small percentage of manuscripts that I’m interested in representing. I have decided not to request one for your book because I don’t feel that I’m intrigued enough to be its best representative.
Should you need resources for querying, finding writing resources and groups, or if you’d like to know more about how I choose manuscripts, please visit (this section of my agency’s website) for more information. I wish you the best of luck in finding a home for your writing. Thank you again for giving me the opportunity to consider your work.
Warm regards,
Hallie
__________________________________
And if I were fortunate enough to be able to give some feedback to each and every author I declined, I’d note the following:
This was a close call for me, and one of the last to come off my “maybe” list. The query just didn’t stand out quite enough in the end. Best of luck in finding representation!
The Spidermonkey says
Thank you for your query, which I have considered carefully. I’m sorry to say I can’t represent you at this time.
Your story seemed like generic SF and lacked any real hook.
This is a subjective opinion of course, and others may see it differently. Good luck!
Anonymous says
Dear Author,
Thank you for considering me. I can see this being picked up elsewhere, but unfortunately I have to pass. Reason for rejection – personal taste.
Best of Luck!
Agent X-9
Heather says
Dear Author,
Thank you very much for taking the time to query our agency. I have given your project thoughtful consideration; unfortunately, it is not a good fit for us at this time because, although the project seems to be well conceived, I had some difficulty with your word choice in the query letter, and feel the manuscript may need extensive editing prior to being ready for shopping at publishing houses. However, after a revision of your query letter and manuscript, please feel free to resubmit to my attention.
Sincerely,
Heather
abouttothunder says
Dear Author,
Thank you for the opportunity to represent your work. Unfortunately, it isn’t a good fit for me. Since you deserve an agent who will fully support you project, I will have to pass.
I wish you the best of luck in finding representation.
Sincerely,
Agent-for-a-day Sara
Rik says
Thank you for submitting your book – Long Shot Lost – for my consideration. Regrettably, I do not feel that I am able to represent this work for you. Best wishes for your future endeavours. Agent Rik.
GuyStewart/DISCOVERCHURCH says
Dear Author:
Thank you for your query, but I’m going to have to pass. I do not feel strongly enough about your story to represent it well.
Sincerely, Guy Stewart
EJN says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, I could not follow this query at all, and will have to pass on it. Keep writing and keep trying.
Best of luck,
Agent EJN
Meggrs says
I’ll bite–request for pages. This strikes me as in the vein of Ann Aguirre’s recent “Grimspace,” and I’d like to see if the writing is compelling and well-paced.
AgentforDay says
Dear Author,
Thank you for submitting LONG SHOT LOST for my consideration, but this genre is not what I am looking for at this time.
I enjoyed the premise and recognize that you are a talented writer.
Good luck with your search for representation.
Please feel free to submit future endeavors.
Sincerely,
Agent for the Day
“Crap” and “Mind-Raping”!
Please, my delicate sensibilities!
Save these tidbits as a surprise in the novel where in context they might be less jarring. – But, on the other hand, you certainly caught my attention, and I suspect the query clearly conveys the novel’s narrative voice.
Interesting approach for providing the primary character, the conflict and bare-bones plot.
Effective.
If I had any clue what would sell in the sci-fi arena to compare LONG SHOT LOST against, I might be tempted. This exercise proves to me that we need the right agent for the right job… and a “No.” from the wrong agent gives us the opportunity to find the right agent!
Leis says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query. Your premise has merit, but it does not suit my current list needs.
Good luck with your work.
Best regards,
Agent for a Day
Madhat says
Dear Author:
I’m going to have to pass on this one.
-Agent
Why: I’m looking for science-fiction, but this seems to be written in Klingon. I don’t understand it.
AndrewDugas says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query, but I do not believe I would be the best advocate for your novel. I wish you luck in finding representation elsewhere.
Sincerely,
Andy