This query is part of the Be an Agent for a Day contest. Rules and Regulations here
Please post your rejection or manuscript request in the comment section!
Dear Agent for a Day,
Now that Dan Taylor’s back home in North Carolina, and a rookie detective for the Raleigh Major Crimes Unit, he can’t be sure which part will be the worst:
The deadly mistake from his past?
The constant battle with his faith?
Harris, the senior partner he hates?
Or their first case together?
Someone is picking off members of the southern publishing industry using a variety of religious punishments, and calling himself ‘The Messenger.’ Taylor and Harris receive a cryptic note announcing that they have just one weekend to discover what ‘the message’ is, and the bodies keep piling up. They must battle the Messenger, the FBI, their captain, and each other, all while finding a way to save a writer they may dislike more than the killer. As the deadline closes in, Dan discovers an ally he never expected to hear from again, and finds himself fighting to save his family and his life.
Complete at approximately 70,000 words, THE MESSENGER is a fast-paced mystery with an inexperienced protagonist who must reexamine his beliefs and his resolve in the face of the most dangerous thing he’s ever encountered.
My first short story is forthcoming in the next issue of Spinetingler Magazine, and I teach high school British Literature and Creative Writing in North Carolina. This is my first novel.
Thank you for your time and consideration,
Author
STATS: 8% request rate
Just_Me says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query. Your novel sounds intriguing but at this time does not suit our list. We wish you the best of luck placing it with another agency.
Sincerely,
Agent
Note: Close, but not quite enough to make this jump out for me. And I like my thrillers a little longer. With a 5 page sample of fantastic writing this might get bumped up the MAYBE pile.
TecZ aka Dalton C Teczon - Writer says
Dear Author:
Thank you for your query and for allowing me to consider your work.
While your novel, “The Messenger,” sounds exciting, I feel I’m not the right fit for your project. Therefore, I must decline on this project right now. But I do want to encourage you to continue submitting. Just because a project isn’t quite right for me, doesn’t mean the right agent isn’t just around the corner.
I wish you the best of luck with all your writing endeavors and in the querying and submission process. Persistence pays off, so don’t give up!
Best regards,
Dalton C. Teczon – Agent
Flemmily says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, I feel that THE MESSENGER is not a fit for our agency.
Best of luck with your future endeavors,
Flemmily
Maria A says
Thank you for thinking of our agency, but not for us at this moment.
Best of luck,
Agent
Davien says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your submission, but this is not for me. I wish you luck in finding a home for your manuscript.
All the best,
Jennifer Sansom says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query. It’s not right for me, but please keep me in mind for future submissions.
Regards,
Jenn S.
(Reason: the query seemed adequately written, just too general. Nothing really grabbed my attention. It could be because I’m not an expert in this genre, but nothing made this concept pop out at me.)
Janine says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query, but I am not the right agent for this. Best of luck.
Just didn’t grab me.
Nora Coon says
Not right for us at this time. Best of luck.
***
There are a lot of books (and TV shows!) out there that have done the religious-serial-murder angle. I’d like to know more about what makes your novel different.
Alisa says
No, thank you.
Alisa.
Annie Reynolds says
Dear author
Thank you for taking the time to submit your query to the A.F.A.D. agency.
Let me start by telling you I did enjoy your query, your novel concept caught my interest. I did however find your query letter could benefit from additional polishing, and would be happy for you to resubmit your query at a later date.
Yours truly,
Annie Reynolds
Aisling says
Dear Author,
I am sorry to inform you that I am not interested in your book. It does not fit with what I am looking for right now so I regret to tell you that, although I appreciated you sending me your query, I would not like to represent your work. I wish you the best of luck with your future writing!
Aisling
Anonymous says
Dear Author,
I liked your story and I would like to hear more about it.
Sincerely,
Mitsubishi
Asherose says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your submission, but it isn’t for me at this time. Best of luck with it elsewhere!
Agent
Reasoning: Good query structure, but the blurb was too long and gave too much information, not enough character interest. Rewritten, would probably succeed.
drat says
Dear Author,
Thank you for sending me your query. I gave it careful consideration, but ultimately I concluded I’m not the right agent for the book. Keep me in mind for future projects, though, as I did enjoy the query.
Good luck with your manuscript, and query widely!
Thanks,
SDC
Anonymous says
Thank you for your query, though I don’t think I’m interested in taking your story idea. Keep on writing.
-Thanks,
Suzuki Volkeswagon
Anonymous says
Dear writer,
I appreciate the query but your book is not what I am looking for at the moment. However, I wish you luck in getting this book published.
best regards,
Nathaniel Orange
Anonymous says
Dear writer,
I enjoyed your query, but I’m afraid I’m not the right agent to represent this work. I’d love to see more of your writing.
Gloria Valentine
Anonymous says
Dear Author,
I appreciate your time and efforts, but I am sorry to say that I do not wish to represent your story. If you have another story idea, please send it to me in the future, and I would be happy to look at it.
Best Wishes,
Quintus Blackburn
Katalina Marie says
Dear Author,
I’m sorry but I don’t think that this book is the one for me.
Regards,
Katalina Marie
Anonymous says
Dear Writer,
Hey, I thought it sounded good. Please send me a 50-page partial.
Thanks,
AM
(No, Sir, I’m NOT sucking up. I actually liked it.)
Anonymous says
Dear Author,
I am not interested in your novel. Keep writing, your story had potential but was not for me. Feel free to Query me later with another piece of your work.
Anonymous says
Dear Author,
Thank you for the submission, but I regret to inform you that I will not be picking up your story.
Keep Writing,
Agent Jackie Moon
Anonymous says
Dear Author,
Thank you for the submission, but I regret to inform you that I will not be picking up your story.
Keep Writing,
Agent Jackie Moon
Anonymous says
Dear author,
I appreciate your query and found your concept interesting; however, it is just not what I am looking for. I look forward to future queries from you!
Thank you, Scarlett Cyrus
Anonymous says
Dear Author,
I have decided not to take up your offer on publishing this book. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to view your material.
Thank You,
Happy Gilmore
Anonymous says
Dear Author,
I regret to inform you that I am not interested in representing your story. I hope you have better luck in the future.
Best of luck,
Arkham
LateInTheGame says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query. Unfortunately, I am not the best representative for your work.
Good luck in your search for representation.
All the best,
Agent LateInTheGame
Reba says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query. Unfortunately, it is not the right fit for me.
Best,
Reba
(Note: There are elements to this story I find intriguing. I just wasn’t sold by the query. Good luck!)
Mira says
Dear Author,
I seriously considered this one. I really think ‘Dan Brownesque’ novels are highly marketable. I like your writing in your query. I like the ‘not-friends, but will learn to respect each other male buddies’ theme.
One thing – as an agent, I might find myself looking for a romance. That’s typical in a mystery/thriller like this one. Is there one?
I’ve decided not to request a partial, because I’m guessing this isn’t yet published. It’s easy for me to imagine that I’m wrong – in this case, it could all come down to the writing. If your writing is good, and the story is fast-paced, it could really all come together and work very well.
I could see this not only as a book, but film. Good luck to you!
I wish you the absolute best!
Mira
Kate H says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query. I’m afraid I’m not the right agent to represent you, but I wish you the best of luck.
Kate H
s.koncilja says
Dear Author,
I received and read your query. Unfortunately it is not something that I’m looking for at the moment.
Keep me informed about your future work and good luck!
Agent S.K.
Dorothy says
Dear Author:
Thank you for your submission. Please send a full synopsis and the first 50 pages. Let’s see what we can do with this.
Eva Ulian says
Thank you for your submission, although I get the impression that you are using religion and faith merely as a vehicle and cashing in on that. Nevertheless since this fits ideally with your genre I would like to request the first 5 pages
Shannon says
Dear Author,
Thank you for submitting your query for THE MESSENGER for review. Unfortunately, I am not the right person to represent this story. This is a subjective business so another agent may feel differently. Good luck.
Sincerely,
Shannon
superwench83 says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, your manuscript isn’t right for me. Best wishes in your search for an agent.
Sincerely,
Agent for a Day
publishingcareer says
Dear Author
Thank you for your interest in our agency and submitting your query for your novel The Messenger.
I read it with interest but unfortunately it is not what I am looking for.
Best of luck and kind regards.
Yours faithfully
Robert Sullivan AFAD
Melissa says
Form rejection:
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query. Unfortunately it doesn’t meet my needs at this time.
Thank you and best of luck,
Melissa (Ximera)
Dave says
Sorry, but I’m going to have to pass. Don’t give up though!
Nikki Hensley says
Dear Author:
Thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, I don’t think I am the right agent for this novel. Best of luck in your search!
Agent Nikki
vicariousrising says
Thank you for your submission. I regret that I don’t feel this project isn’t right for me.
I wish you the best in your writing endeavors.
Hildegarde512 says
Thank you for submitting however [If I were a real agent, a GENTLE FORM REJECTION would exist here].
Hallie says
Dear Author,
Thank you for submitting your query to My Imaginary Yet Successful Literary Agency. I receive many queries each day, and I request only a small percentage of manuscripts that I’m interested in representing. I have decided not to request one for your book because I don’t feel that I’m intrigued enough to be its best representative.
Should you need resources for querying, finding writing resources and groups, or if you’d like to know more about how I choose manuscripts, please visit (this section of my agency’s website) for more information. I wish you the best of luck in finding a home for your writing. Thank you again for giving me the opportunity to consider your work.
Warm regards,
Hallie
__________________________________
And if I were fortunate enough to be able to give some feedback to each and every author I declined, I’d note the following:
I thought the storyline could be interesting, but it didn’t stand out enough for me to choose it as one of my top five. It also is a little short for the genre, but that didn’t really play into my decision here. Best of luck in finding representation.
Vic K says
Thank you for submitting to my agency, however we’re going to take a pass at this time.
Vic K
Reason; It could be great but I can’t tell from the query which I found too short.
Heather says
Dear Author,
Thank you very much for taking the time to query our agency. I have given your project thoughtful consideration; unfortunately, it is not a good fit for us at this time because, although the project is built on an interesting premise, the story does not feel unique or compelling at this time; however, after a revision of your query letter and/or partial manuscript, please feel free to resubmit to my attention.
Sincerely,
Heather
The Spidermonkey says
Thank you for your query, which I have considered carefully. I’m sorry to say I can’t represent you at this time.
This sounds a bit generic, and is too short.
This is a subjective opinion of course, and others may see it differently. Good luck!
Kendra says
Dear Author,
Thank you for submitting your work. Concidering my current workload, I can only take on projects I feel truly passionate about. The Messenger peaked my interest, but I didn’t find myself truly drawn to the idea. I have to pass. Good luck in your writing.
-Kendra
abouttothunder says
Dear Author,
Thank you for the opportunity to represent your work. Unfortunately, it isn’t a good fit for me. Since you deserve an agent who will fully support you project, I will have to pass.
I wish you the best of luck in finding representation.
Sincerely,
Agent-for-a-day Sara
Rik says
Thank you for submitting your book – The Messenger – for my consideration. Regrettably, I do not feel that I am able to represent this work for you. Best wishes for your future endeavours. Agent Rik.
Martin Willoughby says
(form rejection)
genkischuldich says
Dear Author,
Thank you for submitting your query to us. Please send your manuscript to us as a reply to this e-mail.
The plot is interesting, but I didn’t really like list the questions at the start.
Thank you very much,
“Genki”