Alright then! You have seen the queries, now it’s time to take a look at the pages to see which partial you think represents the strongest work and would be most likely to sell to a publisher. Thinking like an agent and setting aside which one you would be most likely to read in your spare time, which one do you think has the best chance of selling? Like the busy Agent for a Day that you are, you only need to read as far as you need to in order to make a decision.
I created individual posts for each of the entries so as not to make this post 150 pages long. Here they are (please ignore all formatting issues, which are due to copying over, though this is actually true to life):
I’M A NOBODY
I WOULD HAVE LOVED YOU ANYWAY
SHORELINE
BLACK EMERALDS
UNREALITY CHICK
Annnnnd as I mentioned yesterday, please be exceedingly, ridiculously, incredibly nice to the participants who have so bravely offered their queries and sample pages to science.
The poll!! (click through if you’re reading in an RSS feed or via e-mail):
UPDATE 2:59 Whoops! While housecleaning on the blog I accidentally published a rough draft of tomorrow’s post, which may have been caught by some feed readers. Sorry for the inconvenience, full post tomorrow.
Well done, brave souls!
Of the five, I particularly liked three: I'M A NOBODY, SHORELINE, and UNREALITY CHICK (so much for being different!) All three of them threw me at some point, but all three had enough promise that I would probably have wanted to request more.
I'M A NOBODY came off as having the likelihood of being a little issue-driven. That worries me, but it can be done well and made saleable, especially with a popular issue like human rights. Also, as scj pointed out, Jennifer gave Dominic too much info too easily. The premise looks interesting, though, and the feel of the story reminded me of other fantasy novels I've read. Great opening hook.
SHORELINE sounded suspiciously like TWILIGHT in places. I'm not complaining out of a dislike for Meyers' books–I love the Twilight Saga and have read it five times–but your referencing "Team Switzerland" and then having a gorgeous broody guy with an automatic dislike for the protagonist all in the first few pages knocked me right out of your story and into Bella Swan's. Those are such easy fixes, though, and I absolutely LOVE your premise. The mix of science and magic is beautiful too. I really, really want to know how this story ends.
UNREALITY CHICK's immediate dive into romance and the apparent flawlessness of the young prince both concerned me. I'd save the attempted kissing for later (let it build some suspense) and make the guy a little less perfect from the outset. But Beck was the protagonist I wanted to spend two hundred pages with. She made me laugh, and right away her terrified climb of a giant tree to "be wild" made her relatable.
I'm still deciding between the latter two. SHORELINE's polish and great premise? Or UNREALITY CHICK's lovable protagonist? Snap decisions are the monsters from my nightmares–reason #459711 that I'm not an agent.
I thought I was going to be hovering between UNREALITY CHICK and SHORELINE until I got to the end of UNREALITY CHICK chapter 1. UNREALITY CHICK totally!
Something about the BLACK EMERALDS query intrigued me when you posted it last time, but it just didn't seem to come across in the pages…. the query voice and actual manuscript voice really didn't match up with each other.
… aaaand one would think that after reading the Twilight Saga five times, I'd put the apostrophe in the right place in Stephenie Meyer's name. Shoot.
P.S. Thank you for giving us a taste of your job, Nathan! This was fun.
I thought #5 was too short and I don't think it's possible to jump out of the way to avoid lightning unless you already have some kind of special powers.
The number one YA book is over 115,000 and the next three in the series are equally as long. Black Emerald got my vote because I think it would have teenage girls dying to read about the MC.
I voted for Shoreline. The writing and pacing was superior and the story unique.
The only other work that came even close was Unreality Chick. However, my interest was lost in what I felt was excessive narrative.
Okay, now I get it. It's a mess – I do NOT envy your job. I was most excited about Unreality Chick and the pace of the novel was great and matched the interest of the query. I get why agents want a SHORT query. Just enough to be curious.
Thanks!
I wavered between SHORELINE and UNREALITY CHICK… Both have great voice, great narrators/protagonists, and the writing is crisp and clear. But it was Shoreline that stuck with me… I wish I could read more of it!
Are we going to hear the thoughts of the authors when this is finished?
Okay, I'm an Agent for a Day; a busy guy looking for a needle in a haystack.
Based on what I saw in the five queries, I don't think I would have requested a partial for any of them, but I picked Shoreline because I thought it was the most marketable. Then, based on the samples, I don't think I'd request a full manuscript for any of them, either, though I selected Unreality Chick as the best sample pages.
Now, before blasting me for being mean, it's not that the queries or the samples were bad, it's just that each one of them had something that I found off-putting and as a busy Agent for a Day looking for that needle in a haystack, I think I would have kept on digging through my slush pile hoping for something that would knock my socks off.
I had picked Unreality Check for the query and I picked Shoreline for the excerpt. Why? Honestly, I'm at work and don't have enough time to read them all the entire way through. So I decided to vote for the one that had caught my interest after a couple of pages.
After reading what was probably the first 2 or 3 pages, Shoreline is the only one I wanted to keep reading. Just being honest. 🙂 I liked the voice and the premise.
Shoreline really surprised me–I enjoyed it so much more than I had expected I would based on the query.*
Unreality Chick did not surprise me; I had expected it to be good based on the query, and found it so.
The other three MSes are quite a bit better than I had expected from the queries, though my editorial blue pencil was practically bouncing around with eagerness to help the writers dig their good ideas out from under some excess verbiage.
How nice to get a chance to see this process in detail, and thanks to the writers who agreed to be guinea pigs.
*The query seemed, to me, to be a bit preachy and clunky, but the protagonist definitely came alive in the pages. I look forward to reading the whole book someday.
Again, UNREALITY CHICK. I'm requesting that full!
Of all the stories, Reality Chick was the one that drew me right in, and made me want to read further.
I like the way it jumps right into the story, and shares information – and drops hints – without resorting to any sort of info dump.
Additionally, the information that needs to be clear is clear (I didn't get confused at any point), but stuff that does not need to be made clear is not needlessly clarified (i.e. no extraneous descriptions of characters).
I also feel like, on a line by line level, the writing is solid. As I read, I didn't find myself thinking, "I could have said that better," or, "this line feels awkward," or, "rough transition," etc.
That having been said, I wonder whether I was biased by which query letter I voted for. Maybe next time around, you should do two batches of five, and have one group of people vote on Query Batch A and Writing Sample Batch B, and have the other group do the reverse, to avoid the possible effects of, "I was already rooting for that one."
I was prepared to like #2 and #5. I found that I didn't like #2 as much as I had hoped (this was the query I picked though). Just felt not quite ready.
#3 surprised me. Didn't like query but the pages were well-written and the voice engaging.
#5 was best. I would request this one.
I haven't finished reading but so far, it's been eye-opening to have a sneak peek (See, Nathan? I am being careful with "peek", "peak" and "pique") into this part of your job.
One particularly interesting thing is that I was drawn to one query above all others and to a different partial. And I can definitely see your 30-page rule.
Thanks for the education.
My favourite out of the bunch is the Shoreline. It hooked me straight away.
Those who entered should be mighty proud of themselves – and brave!
You certainly earn your money, Nathan!
For the query, I voted for Unreality Chick (I like the title "Unreality Check" better, or "Unreality Chic", btw). For the sample, I voted Shoreline. #1 & #2 had problematic time jumps (if more than a day is passing on your first page, you're probably starting your novel in the first place.) #1 was a lot better and more interesting than I expected from the query. I don't know why you don't start the novel with a confrontation between your characters, though. That'd be a lot more interesting than just stalking around. #2 I didn't understand why it was so important to the main character that she not tell Jack at first and then tell Jack later, and I didn't want to stick around to find out.
#4 dumped me because the opening scene is cliche and because of grammar errors. It could almost have been the eavesdropping scenes from Harry Potter. Unreality Chick lost me because I didn't know what Kudzu was and had to look it up. More importantly, I felt like the character was telling about her traits, not showing. She was trying too hard to force me to like her.
I thought all the partials had potential, but they need a little work.
Shoreline had its share of minor glitches, but it's all the stuff you can iron out. It feels a lot like the Y.A. Fantasy I've read before, and I think readers of the genre will be able to jump right into it and swim around. Hands down the best. It was my second favorite in querying, and it didn't surprise me since I thought the original query was so clean.
It's a little weird. When I read all the queries, I thought "Unreality Check" was the best. And the writing was good but I liked the writing in "I'm a Nobody" a lot more.
Still, I think, if I had to request a full from only one, I'd go with "Unreality Check" but I think both are pretty good.
I have to admit, I chose the query for I'm a Nobody because it seemed the lesser of the cliches. Now, don't harsh on me for being harsh, I'm being honest here.
I liked all of the queries, but the fact that Nobody did not sound like a typical fantasy. It was not the strongest by far, but they all had their strengths.
Now, as I read through the stories, Shoreline stands out the most. I could not read far into much of them except Shoreline. While the grammatical errors and typos might be a result of copying over, they tend to throw me off. But if the story isn't strong enough to capture my attention despite slight mistakes, then forget it. Call me a typical reader. I love me some fantasy and YA literature. But I don't like having to wade through dull paragraphs to get to the good stuff. Which is making me re-think my own. I will go back now that I am not having to pretend to be an agent and give each of them a fair read, but Shoreline caught my attention the most. I actually got into it and placed it aside to read more later.
Good experiment, Nathan. I enjoyed it and look forward to the rest of the discussion. 😀
To me, the writing itself is every bit as important as premise, plot, character development, etc. With that in mind, SHORELINE is clearly in a different league than the others.
I made my decision by reading only the first few paragraphs. Unreality Chick first, Shoreline close second. I loved the first line in Shoreline. I wanted to read more.
Thanks for brave everyone.
This has been so educational and interesting. Thank you, Nathan!
I voted for the Black Emeralds query but was disappointed with the partial. I agree with those who have said it feels like jumping into a complex movie half way through.
I'm not a YA person at all, so none of these stories appeal to me overmuch, but I voted for Unreality Chick today because I think it's the one that would sell best to that audience. As others have said, though, it does seem like a slightly younger audience than YA.
I ended up deciding between UNREALITY CHICK and SHORELINE, and chose SHORELINE in the end. Both had engaging stories and good writing, but as a teenager, the MC's voice in UNREALITY CHICK bothered me more and more as I read on because it was so out of date– past the point of quirky. Also, the jokes and light-heartedness began to get tiring after five chapters. I would recommend UC's author to do some more research on how teenagers really converse.
I changed my vote to a query that wasn't even on my list.
Here's my constructive criticism on what I read (because that's my idea of being nice):
#1: Some of the sentence structures are awkward (ex: the second sentence didn't read like a fragment so I had to reread it). Tighten up the paragraphs about the locked doors to keep the plot paced, and then slow down through the next day to describe the setting and the MG, make us care for him. Make it clearer that Jennifer is the girl he saw and use his seeing her at school to describe her instead of telling us.
#2: I wanted to feel more intensely about the letter. There's a lot of telling about her party and life instead of showing. Jump right into her getting ready for her party or at her party so we feel her excitement about turning 18 and shut it down when the letter arrives, making us feel her fear and confusion. It's great that you have those two juxtaposed so use them stronger.
#3: My favorite opening line. I immediately felt pulled into the MG's story with her. I wasn't incitially clear about why she was at the beach and what she was doing, but overall a good, strong opener. It looses a little steam from there, a lot of description wandering in the MG's head without much going on. Keep up that opening pace.
#4: Give us some intensity in this opening discussion. There's a lot of description, which is good once you get a sense of the novel, but at this point I'm not sure who to focus on or root for or why this story is exciting. Balance the description with some action. I'd think about starting the story somewhere else, with something that has a bang.
#5: I don't want to be told the MG is nice from her telling about yearbook entries. It took me a little bit to get a sense of the humor. Start with it, as a way for her to write off those nice entries while she's climbing the tree mocking her lack of climbing skills. You can give us background while she's stuck in the tree kicking herself for going up there. The storm was a nice touch, but get there quicker. Give us as great an opener as you end the chapter with.
Thanks for doing this, Nathan. It was fun and I'm sure invaluable to the writers who were selected.
Wow, I was really surprised. Voted for BLACK EMERALDS on the query but SHORELINE for the partial.
Huh. Very interesting. I can see how agents jobs can be pretty complicated.
K
Wow. I would stink as an agent. The query that I choose didn't match the opening chapter that I choose.
I am humbled before thee, O Great Agent Nathan. You have one seriously difficult job…not that I didn't think that before, it's just, you know, uh…even more evident. 😉
Thanks brave souls!
I didn't pick Shoreline as my query, but it caught my attention today. It's engaging, well written – has just the right amount of snarky teen-speak without getting obnoxious. Could be commercially sucessful. jmho The query was a little muddled. It felt like too much had to be explained – but wow I would have missed out on a great story.
I picked I'm a Nobody for my query. Still think it has potential, but get me through the door faster. I might request revisions and offer to take another look. (wow, I think this agent for a day is going to my head, lol)
Nicely done everyone! Great experiment, Nathan.
I thought Shoreline query wasn't great — but the opening was well-written! However, my favorite query was also my favorite opening (Unreality Chick) — but I think it's because humor is selling well right now. (I'd probably be likely to read either Shoreline or Unreality Chick on my own.)
I must be some rare garden variety. I think like 3%-9% of your readers, Nathan. I thought "I'm a Nobody" dropped questions and foreshadowing and pulled the reader in, which I think is a good indicator of sales ability. I thought the horror-feel of "I Would Have Loved You Anyway" gave a nice sense of tension and again, made me somewhat interested in reading more even though I don't do horror. Kudos to the authors!
I liked the concept of all of them. I felt that the writing in the pages was in most cases stronger than in the query, so if I was an agent, I think my submission guidelines would be query + 5 pages.
That said, most could benefit greatly from hiring an editor prior to submissions, as they have many typos and grammar errors that I found distracting.
I tried to ignore the cosmetics, and ended up reading 2 entries all the way through, because I liked the voice. But UNREALITY CHICK got my vote because I loved the voice, got caught up in the action right away, and connected with the character immediately. It was also the cleanest as far as errors went.
I tried to read at least a few pages into all of them and then I skipped around a bit in the pages. Long story short all the pages looked like how I imagined they would from the queries, which suggests to me that the query process works well enough.
I voted for Unreality Chick the first time and I think I commented that it came off a bit juvenile in the query. The pages proved me right. The voice is very cutesy, a younger girl's idea of how an older girl would act, with the emphasis on her fears, and her girlyness, and the boy liking her and all.
I thought the writing in Black Emeralds wasn't bad, and the story is clearly fleshed out, but the writing had no flow. It didn't carry my eye. I criticized the query for not hanging together or picking the best details to talk about. The pages felt the same way, the focus was off. Another work not ready to see the world yet.
Shoreline had the strongest voice, but you could stand to have a friend with an eye go over a paper copy ruthlessly with a red pen.
The first manuscript lost me at the beginning because I had no clue what was going on. Too vague, much like the query. The one with the serial killer was a little silly for me, which is how I felt about the query. Especially when the girl put the letter away. Again, the premise comes off forced.
All five needed work and I wouldn't be able to request them if I were an agent, but Shoreline was the closest, for me. There's definitely something there with that story. The right juxtaposition of magical girl with mythology and some sort of romance. I nitpick: does she really remember something that happened when she was five weeks old so clearly she can describe what she did in the water?
I flipped on Unreality Chick because of the maturity level… with the caveat that there's a level of talent inherent in the writing, and the humor has its heart in the right place.
The queries and the partials just about matched in quality, I thought. Although I did feel like reading the queries biased me towards what to expect in the partials.
Take UNREALITY CHICK, for example. Yesterday I said the query had a good voice, an interesting setup, but a vague storyline. Likewise, I felt like the opening to the partial was AMAZING, but I started losing interest as things became more fantastic.
Was I reading the partial objectively? Honestly, I have no idea. I may have just seen what I expected to see because of the query. In any case, very interesting experiment.
Well, I do believe it's time for agents to do away with the dreaded query letter and just request 1st three chapters. In the time it took to read the queries, then the sample chapters, it would be quicker to just go straight to the ms.
Unreality chick was probably the closest in terms of voice when you compare the query to the ms, but the others? Not even close.
I didn't get passed the first page with most. Although there is great promise in each of them, I don't think any are ready for publication.
I voted Unreality chick because it felt as though, with some help from an editor, it was 'almost' publishable. I read the first chapter and will go back for more.
The dialogue was a bit clunky, and I did wish it started a bit earlier; to get to know the shy character better. But, it's the one for me.
I stand here ready to confess. The story I voted for in the query phase didn't even blip my radar in the 30 page phase.
The query I thought sounded weak, had fantastic first pages. It didn't get my vote, but I was very impressed.
My number two choice for query (and just barely number two) was my number one choice for pages. It was strong in the query phase and remarkable in the pages.
I won't say who I voted for in query stage, because I was disappointed with the actual prose.
However, my vote in the page phase was "Unreality Chick." Well done and I think has some bank in it.
Once again I'm incredibly impressed by the bravery of these 5. Wow. GO YOU!
My vote still went to UNREALITY CHECK, but man, SHORELINE was a close second.
This was an interesting experiment because for the query I chose Unreality Check as being the most interesting, most cohesive and best voice. Of the queries, Shoreline was the one that lost me.
But for the partials, I was kind of surprised how different some of the voices were in the query and book. This was the most apparent with I Would Have Loved You Anyway.
In the end, I think the partial that has the most polished feel and most readily publishable is Shoreline. While I was uninterested in the query, I really loved the voice, the pacing, the word choices, the dialogue, and the descriptions. I didn't give a hard editing read through, but I didn't see any real glaring grammar/spelling problems and there was no weird word usage that threw me off. Once I started reading Shoreline I felt like I was drawn into the story and did not emerge until I had finished all 30 pages. That means a lot to me.
Wow! What an eye-opener! Nathan, thanks so much for the time you've taken to run this "experiment." And a HUGE thanks to all you writers willing to put your queries and pages up on this experimental chopping block!
While it was fun to get a glimpse into the difficult life of an agent, I'm even more impressed with how much this process taught me.
First of all, being able to read both the queries and first 30 pages of five novels (that I didn't write!!) is a splendid way to see what works and what doesn't in the querying process. In fact, I almost feel like I should pay the five volunteer authors for providing these teaching materials!
Second, it was a good reminder of the wide range in readers' tastes. All five of these books got both kudos and criticisms; there is no formula for writing the perfect novel.
Third, reading the queries/pages, the blog posts, and all the comments has hammered in a crucial point: my query should match my book, and they should both be impeccably edited before going out.
Among the queries, I chose one that wasn't necessarily the best written or the cleverest, but described the most intriguing story (to me) with the most challenging conflict, a seemingly impossible one that would keep readers glued to the page. From the pages, I chose the same novel because the writing, while needing a good edit, gave me confidence that this author could fulfill the promise of the outlined story. (Both choices were for SHORELINE.)
I wish all five authors the very best in getting their novels published, and I have renewed awe for the job done by literary agents.
Thank you, Nathan, for a terrific learning experience. This was difficult, since there were a few that piqued my interest. Jeesh. Your job is crazy tough.
I chose UNREALITY CHICK because of the voice. And, with a few wrinkles ironed out, it would be a total winner.
This was a great exercise and really got me immersed in the agent's world. (I think I like it!)
I personally wouldn't request anything further for any of the projects. The only one that I could read beyond the first page was Shoreline (so that gets my vote), but after digesting it for a little while, I still think I would pass.
We all have our quirks and maybe I'm totally missing something because it seems like a lot of people really thought these were decent projects. I need the words to pull me into the page, devour me so that I can't get away, not simply tell me a good story. (and all of the stories sounded pretty good from the queries)
At the end of the day, it seems like the entire procedure boils down to a crapload of luck depending on whose eyes are on the page. Who knows if any of this really works but that's the system, until something pulls the rug out from under it.
I just wanted to add a little something.
I entered my own query and 30 pages to this contest. Mine had no hope of getting chosen since it's an adult genre book that was less represented. 🙂
BUT if mine were one of these five? Wow. I'd be so freaked out at this point. It takes a lot to put yourself on display as a writer. I hope that the participants in this experiment remember we've all been there. It sucks to hear the criticism.
I'd hate for them to be discouraged at all. This will only make their writing stronger! What a blessing to get so much feedback, even if it may me harsh at times.
Mmkay, that is all… 🙂
Regan – I was thinking the same thing. I think it's wonderful that folks contributed, and I hope they are finding this helpful and educational – and not discouraging!
As far as I can tell, the worst critique is – the piece needs some of editing, or didn't grab me etc. No one has run screaming out of the room – 'aaaggghhh, the pages, the pages, aaagggghhhh, aaggghhhh.'
Everything mentioned is workable and fixable – if the writer even agrees with the feedback.
I think all of these books have great potential, personally. And I would not say that if I didn't believe it.
I think it's pretty interesting. When I read the sample pages for the query I chose yesterday, I wasn't particularly interested. And it only took a page or two for me to realize that. The pages I liked best were for a query I wasn't too impressed by yesterday. It also happens to NOT be one of the top 2.
Nathan, I hope you'll give us a little insight into your thoughts on each query. I'd love to see where my insight rates compared to yours.
When I read the queries I thought Shoreline had the most promise so I voted for that one. I liked the idea of Black Emerald but for some reason I felt as though it wouldn't be pulled off.
I still feel the same today. Shoreline was the only partial I read until the end and the only one I'm keen to know more about. I enjoyed the writing style very much. I would genuinely like to read more of this one.
Black Emerald started at the wrong point for me. It was hard for me to settle into the story so I gave up. Someone else said it was like missing the first half of a film and I agree with that.
Nobody's query didn't do it justice, it was very vague. I quite liked the beginning of the partial but once the MC passed through the door, I found my interest waning. The dialogue didn't flow for me and I gave up after a few more pages.
I would have loved you, I had mixed reactions to the query. The idea had some promise but something put me off. The partial was hard for me to read, there was something clunky about it. I gave up pretty quickly.
Unreality Chick didn't appeal to me at all. I didn't particularly like the query and the voice of the partial irritated me. I couldn't finish it. I'm obviously not the target audience 🙂
I voted for Shoreline again. It's not that the others were bad, part of it is personal preference and part of it is what I feel is a need for a tighter partial. All queries will need some kind of an edit but for me, Shoreline was the most polished and the most engaging partial. It held my attention from the very start and kept me with it until the end.
Having to face reading 30 pages of different samples really forces you to be pickier than usual. I might have finished the others if I didn't have to read four more so I can see why an agent would only skim through the first few paragraphs and make a snap judgement. Interesting exercise and well done to everyone who sent in their queries and partials.
As you intended, we learned that a quality query does not a quality submission make – AND – the reverse is true. My favorite query was not my favorite submission, at all!
I was quite enraptured by the samples for Shoreline. I could see that being a hit and as a reader found myself disappointed when the sample ended. I chose its query yesterday for the creative premise, high marketability and evident character conflict and was glad to find the sample pages even better than the query attested to.
You can never edit enough and I would suggest that for each one. They all have great potential and some cuts will show that. (Although, in UC's case, I think there could be more added to it; though this might be personal taste more. I could see sects of the YA crowd preferring the faster pace.)
I've really gained a deeper level of understand of a literary agent's job. It's hard not to let personal preference shadow a work's level of marketability. This experiment has certainly made me pause and decide to give my own work another quadruple-over before the submission process.
Lol, perhaps I need more than a quadruple-over! *…'understanding'… not 'understand.
As an agent I would politely reject all of them.
Sending a personal encouraging reply only to #1 to resubmit after expanding the current work or upon finishing the next.
I felt all the stories were pretending to be young people speaking to young people except author #1.
"INCLUDING… :Punctuation."
That's what grammar and spelling checkers were invented for.
That work {I'm A Nobody) seemed age appropriate plus talented even after detecting The Hemingway style staccato cross currents with a hoped for future willingness to wax poetic on small bits of detail and chapter resolutions and beginnings.
That work seemed to have a legitimate
YA to YA voice.
I only follow one YA author and she is very popular and seems to truly reach back into the horrors and fears of adolescence.
I'm not a YA fan my opinion should be considered in that context. I am an agent that needs to find a book I can sell. #1 might deliver a YA novel at some point in the future or continue on to adult genres. The rest seemed stuck between age levels.
I found all the works weren't dreamy enough and forcing me to accept I might lose something personal if I didn't finish the whole tale.
I went in knowing I would never see the completed work and accepted that premise as part of the exercise regretting it only for Author#1.
Hence polite rejection letters.
Got a ton of them myself.
Repeat after me.
Rejection is good.
Rejection is good.
…
…
Yesterday I voted for UNREALITY CHICK because I thought the idea would sell better and it had a good solid query…but in the back of my head I yearned to go with SHORELINE. That idea was so fresh to me, even if the query didn't grab me as much.
And something great happened today. SHORELINE proved that it DID have a good story to tell.
In the end though…I went with my gut. SHORELINE gets my vote. Honestly, it had me at the first sentence. The voice grabbed me and didn't let me go. And the conflict was there. Everything in me told me this would sell.
But don't get me wrong. I think UNREALITY CHICK could sell too. If I could I would vote for both. But it just seemed pretty obvious that SHORELINE had better writing.
Like many others I changed my mind: the partial from another submission was far better than the query I had originally voted for. If I had been agent in a real life situation, following up only on the query I likes best, I would have made a MISTAKE: I wouldn't even seen the better partial!
Very, very INTERSTING!
This suggests that maybe something is wrong with the standard agent model (a single agent working on his own). Maybe agents should consider organizing their work differently – as a TEAM rather than a single individual, each ensconced in his office and reading for ever endless strings of queries and partials. It certainly would be easier on the agent – you'd know that where you missed out, your colleague might catch it.
The Pentagon has long known that TEAMWORK often gives better results than the efforts of single individuals trying to solve problems on their own. Then, occasionally, you have the genius that can't work in a team…but very occasionally! On the whole, teamwork generally works better.
BUT, there's always a but: teamwork poses problems of organization and management. A team can't be improvised from one day to the next. Rules have to be adopted to organize the work so that the whole thing doesn't degenerate into acrimonious battles to decide who's right and who's wrong. I won't go into it here. Business schools are full of good advice on how to organize this type of work…
May be literary agencies should think about it? It might help them identify the better writers – in the sense of writers most likely to appeal to a broad audience. In other words, TEAMWORK MIGHT BE THE BETTER WAY TO IDENTIFY BLOCKBUSTERS!
How about that for a SCIENTIFIC CONCLUSION? Mmmmmmmm….
If I could vote for two, it would be Shoreline and Unreality Check. BOTH are books I'd read all the way through in a heartbeat.