In the course of reading the 400+ queries that came in while I was away (answered!), I saw my share of homonym problems, which I usually just chalk up to typos. There’s one, however, that gets me every time: peak/peek/pique. As I Tweeted yesterday, my interest is never “peaked” or “peeked.” It’s only piqued. (Although certainly my interest peaks when I see someone misuse pique.)
My friend Holly Burns recently blogged about the best mispronunciations she’s ever heard, and there certainly are some doozies.
What are your favorite/least favorite malaprops, Spoonerisms, homonym errors, and/or other tips of the slongue or tpyos? Any in particular that always drive you crazy?
Editor with an Ice Pick says
Until I was twelve or so, I thought "misled" was pronounced "MY-zled." I also thought N came before M in the alphabet. (My version of the relevant portion of the alphabet song: "aitch eye jay kay ellenemo pea.") No doubt my young mind had been warped by advertisements for L&M cigarettes ("Come on over to the L&M side").
Phyllis says
I recently read about a dog handler who taught his dog to heal. I thought it was a neat trick.
Anonymous says
I have just read a book in which there is a description of something shuddering 'like a lover in the throws of orgasm'.
Brings to mind images of swinging from the lampshade for all the wrong reasons…
Christi Goddard says
I forgot to mention:
Cavalry and Calvary. One is a lot of horses, another is a mountain.
lite/light
sight/site
Grapeshot/Odette says
Edith Pilaf
Anonymous says
should of instead of should've
Madeleine says
In-FLU-ence as opposed to IN-flu-ence. Kills me when I ear it.
David F. Weisman says
Sorry about those annoying mistakes. All I can really say is their, they're, there. Feel better now?
Who is Felicia? says
What a boatload of comments.
I knew a young pregnant woman who got diabetes and said she had to go to the doctor for "insulation" shots. When the baby dropped (known as lightening, or is it lightning?), she told me the doctor said she was "enlightened."
And one time, she said, she got so mad, she was "fumigating."
I'm totally not making this up.
pearlythebunny says
I am amused when I see "hair-brained" because, aren't most people?
My nine-year-old daughter's friend calls early-release days, "early-relief days," which is an accurate description.
dt says
'Defiantly' for 'definitely' – I HATE it.
Also 'Ten items or less' – seriouslY? It's 'FEWER,' people! Fewer!!
dt says
Flustrated – ick! And I have a really good friend who says it all the time. She also uses 'per se' incorrectly and often. Sigh.
SB says
Homophone errors drive me crazy. (BTW, aren't peek/peak/pique homophones rather than homonyms?) I particularly hate when people type "lightening" instead of "lightning" (but then, that's not even really a homophone).
Another thing that's driven me crazy lately is people spelling "through" as "thru" at inappropriate times. I mean, "thru" is okay in a text, tweet or even an email, but lately I've seen it used in technical and literary pieces when the authors should really know better. (I know "thru" is in the dictionary now, but really! Or maybe I'm just being old-fashioned…?)
Nathan Bransford says
SB-
You're right! Homophones.
ryan field says
"Milktoast" and "Milquetoast"
One is toasted bread soaked in milk, the other is a wimp. It makes me scream when people get these two wrong.
Michael says
As both an English teacher and an aspiring writer, the one that bugs me the most is the your/you're idiocy.
Jil says
I don't like to cast "nasturtiums" at any one but I also go nuts when people write, "He gave his workers full reign." Rein please, as in horses, only rulers reign.
Also is "shone" never used now? The moon shined all night sounds terrible to me. I learned; He shined his shoes until they shone. Actually I guess I usually polished my shoes until they shone. Oh well!
Kimber An says
None. I'm much more likely to be amused than annoyed. Comes from a lifetime of loving and working with children.
Anonymous says
Once worked for a man who insisted on calling 'perverts' 'preverts'
Pamela Toler says
A woman I worked with often described herself as an objectionable third party. It was often totally accurate, but I'm pretty sure that wasn't what she meant.
karen97 says
I see there are already 222 comments so don't know if these have already been mentioned, but on two passes of an editing job I admit I missed hanger/hangar. Fortunately we caught it on the PDF proof.
Also, a client sent a manuscript with gentile when he meant genteel. I seriously laughed out loud on that one.
The Pollinatrix says
karen97 – At least it wasn't "genital."
Rhonda says
<>
Oh. Thank you. I thought I was the only one who didn't think that was normal!
Wool in Sunshine says
I'm working with someone right now who keeps writing "sheik" instead of "chic." Therefore a transcript will read "Let me introduce the sheik [person's name]" which makes me feel like they're some kind of Arab leader.
Darin says
Lose, loose. By far the most annoying.
Maree Anderson says
Drives me crazy when people — esp announcers on radio or TV — pronounce "women" as "woman" instead of "wimmen". As in, "All the woman I know adored Gerard Butler in this movie."
And what's with "I'm bored of that"? Surely it's "bored with that"? Or is that just another of those American things I don't quite get, like "lucked out", which I think means good luck. Whereas in NZ it means the opposite, e.g. "Heck, you really lucked out on that one, didn't you, you poor bugger."
Here's a classic typo I spotted right throughout a book by a very well-known author who writes about vampire hunters: "diety" instead of deity. Really cracked me up. Be afraid: the big bad diet is comin' to get you, mwah hah hah!
Loved this one I spotted: "She took the weighty tomb from the bookshelf." Oh really? What on earth was a tomb doing there?
And then there were the "coy carp swimming in the pond". The author subsequently referred to "coy" in the pond a number of times. She actually meant Koi, which are a breed of carp, not shy fish. Pretty cute typo though, LOL.
Bamboo Grovers says
My favourite mispronunciation is from a friend of mine, in her first year of English teaching was telling her senior class all about hyberbole (pronounced hyperbowl). One of the students put up his hand and said, "Excuse me, Miss, I think it's pronounced "hyperbole".
Wince.
mkcbunny says
Hands down, the "its" and "it's" confusion makes me crazy when I see it.
One I have to watch out for myself when writing is "wave" vs. "waive." I just don't think it through sometimes and have completely mixed them up. I have to do a word search for both and check all uses.
Kendra says
I absolutely hate it when "aunt" is pronounced "ant". My mother's sister is not an insect!
Caroline Steele says
"court marshal" instead of the correct "court martial."
mkcbunny says
Marge: My dad and his family say "woof" and "wooves," as in that Kevin Costner movie Dances with Wooves. Or Peter and the Woof.
In their case, it's a totally regional central CA thing. My friend who grew up in the central valley also does it.
Starstruck says
I can accept wrong word usage in a lot of places, but I can't stand them in published books. One I've seen make it into more than one novel is a mixup between horde and hoard. Or they try to merge it and make a hoarde. And nobody catches it!
mkcbunny says
Oh, and count me as another vote for "Ten Items or Fewer." Every time I see "10 Items or Less," I get all worked up. My husband thinks it's cute that I care.
I have issues with Whole Foods, but at least their signage is grammatically correct. My local foo-foo market has it right, too. But more often, I am at Safeway, under the "Less" line. Grrrrr.
Dianne says
"Tenant" for "tenet." As in "the tenants of his religion."
"Lead" for "led." Sometimes I think people don't believe "led" is a proper word.
Jeannie says
For homonyms:
shear/sheer
And for general misuse of language:
"nucular"
"Pomerarian"
And my favorite:
orientate/d
Btw, Tamie, that's "irks" and not "urks." Urk is the sound you hear when the dog gets sick. Followed by eek! if it's on the carpet. 😀
Wordver: eyberst
Um, never mind.
Krista V. (the former Krista G.) says
Everyday and every day. I swear, I see someone misuse these two EVERY DAY:)
Anonymous says
This is my biggest writing problem, so the best I have found to remedy it is to look-up the word if it's a homonym.
Mine is:
leech/leash/leach
E. F. Collins says
Our and hour. I don't know how many times I've read that typed, "I'll be gone for about an our or two." Aaaargh! You're/your, of course. (I'm one of those that makes the it's/its mistake, but usually by second draft they're fixed. I pick them up on rereads, but my pinkie likes that apostrophe button in combination with an S.)But the one that really pushes my buttons worse than anything is 'wan' being spelled 'one' or won. The words don't even sound the same! Gah!
Missed Periods says
I was grading papers today, and one of my students wrote about taking something for granite. But, instead of it being my least favorite, it may be one of my favorites. It's making my giggle right now.
Gretchen says
I'm on the radio. I had an author on reading from his book, and he pronounced coxswain COCK-SWANE. After laughing out loud, I had to explain the word rhymes with OXEN. He's a comedian so he took it well.
Hywela Lyn says
rein/reign.
One is the long, narrow piece of leather attached to a horse's bit, and the other means to rule, as a monarch.
As a horse lover/owner it drives me mad to read that 'chaos reined'
or 'she reigned in her enthusiasm'!
Kaitlyne says
Orientate. Seriously hate that word. I think what makes it worse is that the person saying it is usually trying to sound smart by doing so.
Jessie says
"Could have went"
"Where are you at"
"Should of"
you're/your
its/it's
they're/there/their
too/to
lose/loose
"acrosst"
My biggest pet peeve is that most people can't seem to spell "definitely." Why do so many people think it has an "a"? I even started a Facebook group about it, but nobody wanted to join 🙁
Jessie says
Also, I've been living in England for a few years and people here tend to say "I am sat here" instead of "I am sitting here." And "different to" instead of "different from." Also I hear a lot of "one of them things" instead of "one of those things." And they say "orientate" instead of "orient," which is technically correct here but it still bothers me.
Elie says
I hate: he was sat on the chair.
I prefer: he sat on the chair, or he was sitting on the chair.
Yvonne Isaak-Andrews says
Thank you, Nathan, for addressing the "anon" fellow who berated you for supposedly disregarding the 419 queries. I have an acquaintance who reads 401 pages an hour — it can be done. I've assumed that pretty much all agents need to be speed readers in order to function in their jobs.
Regarding the topic at hand, I have a split-personality approach:
The editor in me wants everyone to follow *all* the rules without question. They have been put into place in order to maintain the coherence of communication.
The linguist in me, however, appreciates that language is organic. Its *only* reason for existence is to communicate. As long as that communication occurs, it doesn't matter how it's done. It will evolve with the people. That's why we have so many languages and dialects. The advent of texting has essentially created a new language whose rules are both evolving and being set right before our eyes.
That being said, I cringed every time the Olympic announcers said "Here at the Winner Olympics!" I think there was only one announcer who actually pronounced the "t." And "prolly" irritates the heck out of me.
*That* being said, however, I personally prefer the spelling of "grey" versus "gray," merely because something about it looks/feels nicer to me. And I often massage the rule about punctuation *always* being inside the quotation marks — specifically in cases when the quotes are used on a single word or phrase at the end of a sentence.
Anonymous says
I googled and found this:
"English Nightmare…Homophones vs Homonyms"
https://forums.atozteacherstuff.com/showthread.php?t=21628
These threads often work as learning moments for me.
Marleen says
Not exactly the same thing, but Chose / Choose drive me crazy. I know they're simple, but I have to look them up every time I use them to make sure I have the correct one.
Anonymous says
And I loved this:
Malapropism
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
A malapropism (also called a Dogberryism or acyrologia) is the substitution of a word for a word with a similar sound, in which the resulting phrase makes no sense but often creates a comic effect. It is not the same as an eggcorn, which is a similar substitution in which the new phrase makes sense on some level. Occasionally, a phrase is substituted for the original, e.g. Stan Laurel said "What a terrible cat's after me!" (i.e., catastrophe) in Any Old Port!.
(guilty as charged)
Anonymous says
I hate it when people say words wrong. My husband says Ambleeance instead of Ambulance, Binocleers instead of Binoculars and my dad for years said death instead of deaf. "What are you, death?"
I really do wish people would learn the difference between bath and bathe, breath and breathe, and to too and two.