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Writing Significant Other/Friend/Family Appreciation Day

February 16, 2010 by Nathan Bransford 138 Comments

Writing can be a very solitary pursuit: staring in silence at a notebook or a computer screen for hours and hours, and some more hours, and maybe some more hours after that. Writers are often lost in their worlds even when they’re not actually writing and when they are ahem supposed to be spending quality time with their loved ones. Managing to write a novel while also maintaining the love and support of family, significant others, and friends demands a whole lot of those people. They invest in every writer’s dreams through support and patience and they live many of the same highs and lows.

Valentine’s Day was this past weekend, and I thought it would be nice to have a post-Valentine’s Day show of thanks for the significant others, family, and friends who read drafts, find ways to occupy themselves during writing time, listen to complaints about the endless frustrations of the writing life, and offer support when doubts creep in.

Is there anyone you’d like to thank for making your writing life possible?

UPDATE: And here I was all focused on writing this post and not giving thanks to the most important person in my writing life, my wife, who believed that I could be a writer way way way before I ever did. I couldn’t have written a novel without her. And to my family and friends for always being so supportive.

Photo by Jnlin

Filed Under: The Writing Life Tagged With: Life of a Writer, Staying Sane While Writing

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Emily White says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:20 pm

    I would definitely like to thank my husband and two boys for being so patient with me. Yes, you may have to repeat what you say and tug on my sleeve when I'm staring at the screen and typing madly, but I love you for it. Thanks!

    Reply
  2. Steven Till says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:30 pm

    My wife. I spend 8 hours a day at work and then another hour to two at night working on my novel most nights, so she deserves a special thanks for being patient and giving me that time to write without interruption. Maybe I need to get her a puppy to keep her occupied 🙂

    Reply
  3. Sandy & Pamela says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:30 pm

    My husband's my best cheerleader; my mother is my first and most ruthless reader. I don't know how I'd do it without the combination of support and red ink. Thanks, y'all.

    Reply
  4. Stacey Graham says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:31 pm

    I have an incredible support system with my husband and five young daughters who allow me the illusion of the Cone of Silence (airline headphones) while I'm writing and yell out, "Zombie Dating Guide for the win!" when I'm feeling overwhelmed.

    Much love, my little Graham Crackers!

    Reply
  5. Chase March says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:31 pm

    My cousin is an awesome first reader. She gives it to me straight up. She makes all sorts of marks on my drafts like she's a professor. I really appreciate it. She's awesome.

    Reply
  6. nomadshan says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:33 pm

    Sending thanks to my husband Dave, for making me give myself permission to write, and then telling me I'm brilliant (or not) when I do.

    Reply
  7. Alyson says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:33 pm

    My husband. I really don't think I'd have a novel or an agent without his support. He deals with my mood swings, talks to me about my book, helps with self promotion and reads anything I put in front of him. And let me say, my writing mood swings are serious. He's supportive. Not just by letting me do my own thing, but by encouraging me. He wants my book published to be published as much as I do.

    Reply
  8. Mari-Anna Frangén Stålnacke says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:34 pm

    I've been blessed with such a terrific husband! I could not write without his encouraging support. He is also an amazing cook & a goofy and loving dad. He is ready to move to the end of the earth with me if necessary. He is ready to give up his job, his TV and whatever else it takes to get me the right writing conditions. He is literally a divine gift. Thank you, honey! I love you to the moon and back.

    Reply
  9. amy says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:34 pm

    My family (my husband Jim in particular)is wonderful. They put up with the blank stares, the sudden outburst about a character or scene, and the endless preoccupied mind of a thinker(not doer). Which translates to laundry still sitting in the laundry room, or make your own dinner, or worse yet, my stealing things like pictures for my website (thanks Janna).
    Good idea, Nathan. Thanks to you too. I always want to read your gourmet tray of offerings to writers. I wish you well.

    Reply
  10. Natalie Whipple says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:35 pm

    I will never, ever get tired of my husband asking, "Have you written me another chapter yet?"

    I'm not sure he knows how much that keeps me going.

    Reply
  11. aspiring_x says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:37 pm

    My husband who not only falls asleep alone, but bangs on the wall when I get lost in book world and stay up too late. It's nice to have someone who won't let you obsess too much. And my three little boys who understand they need to go to bed so mommy can do her typing. They are also the ones who are eager to hear the lastest (age appropriate) action in the stories! Which makes me feel all warm and fuzzy, you know.

    Reply
  12. Nicole Lorenz says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:41 pm

    My dad. Sometimes he'll call me to ask how I'm doing and get an earful about whatever writing project I've got in front of me instead.

    Reply
  13. Ink says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:41 pm

    My wife, of course, who also writes and understands, and the wee ravenous gremlins.

    Reply
  14. Erinn says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:45 pm

    Thank you to my husband who I ignore so I can play with my imaginary friends. My daughter who still takes long naps. My fellow writer friends who become my cheerleaders when I think every letter I've ever written is complete crap.

    Reply
  15. Kate says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:47 pm

    My husband, who only reads the red tape at the bottom of the screen on ESPN and writes…checks, for supporting my desire to write even though he doesn't quite understand it. And my parents, of course, for always encouraging and supporting my desire to do pretty much anything.

    Reply
  16. Heather says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:48 pm

    My husband, who I sometimes ignore so I can keep writing. He will come to kiss me hello and I'll just give him a peck, with an annoyed face, because he disrupted my flow, then hours later when he goes to bed I'm still at it.

    My writer friends, all of whom are online, for understanding, supporting, encouraging, and critiquing me.

    Reply
  17. Amanda B. says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:50 pm

    I'd like to thank my husband for not throwing my computer at the wall when he walks into the bedroom and there I am, sitting on the bed with my fingers flying over the keys, obsessed with "just five more minutes."

    Reply
  18. Lindsey Edwards says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:50 pm

    My mother critiques my work. I write romance and my mom is an avid reader of romance and she is a retired English teacher so I know her input is gold. I have to thank my husband and father for funding trips to writers conferences. I also have to thank all my online writing buddies especially YA author Heather McCorkle for always being there when exciting news came in or when I needed help with my query. Also have to thank long-distance friend, Erin who is there for me whenever I need someone to talk (or, er, sometimes complain) to.

    Reply
  19. Amalia T. says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:50 pm

    Would not be 5 books in if my husband had not said "You should stay home and write." So thankful and grateful that he wants me writing instead of working a miserable job bagging groceries or the like.

    Reply
  20. Misty says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:51 pm

    Kind of a save-my-butt post, Nathan…'specially because I forgot Valentines since I was working (writing)…whoops. I'm getting everybody a box of chocolate and taping copies of your post on top~ Thanks again!!

    Reply
  21. jcaddell says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:53 pm

    My husband is a saint. A BIG thanks to a wonderful man who supports and encourages the creative fog that surrounds me every day. He is awesome.

    Reply
  22. Kirk K says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:53 pm

    I want to thank my dear wife who has been giving me great feedback on my novel as I move towards completion. She encourages me and has been providing a good kick in the pants when necessary.

    Reply
  23. Shelley Sly says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:55 pm

    Thanks to my incredible husband, who couldn't be more supportive (he even offered to support us financially if I wanted to take time off work to write! Not that I ever would, but it shows how much he believes in me), and my loving mother, who reminds me all the time how talented she thinks I am, and encourages me to write from the heart. I love my family.

    Reply
  24. lboylecrompton says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:57 pm

    Oooo – What a lovely idea! It takes a lot of faith to write a novel and there have been many times my husband's faith in me and my dream carried me through! Thanks sweetie!

    Reply
  25. Stephanie says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:57 pm

    Thanks to my wonderful husband and sweet little boys who put up with me as I work away in front of my computer at all hours. My family for offering support and encouragement, and all my friends and early readers that are always pushing me for more! Thanks for everything!

    Reply
  26. Scott says

    February 16, 2010 at 4:58 pm

    My partner has my enduring thanks for putting up with me during my obsessive, and non-obsessive, writing periods.

    Reply
  27. Nicole Marie Schreiber says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:02 pm

    My husband, friends, neighbors, kids' grandparents, and everyone else who helps me with taking care of my two young boys when I need to lock myself in my office and write! I also am very thankful to my critique group, Viva Scriva, for encouraging me. They are the best valentines a writer could ever have.

    Reply
  28. Pimlicokid says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:02 pm

    My wife: at the beginning, through the long haul and, I know, in the future. It means everything.

    Reply
  29. Lauren Barnholdt says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:04 pm

    This is an awesome idea!

    My husband and my sister, definitely.

    My husband motivates me and always supports me no matter what.

    My sister always believed in me, even before I sold a book, and has read everything I've ever written.

    Thanks guys!

    Reply
  30. Geoff says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:08 pm

    My wonderful wife Michelle for her patience and moral support. My number one beta reader and critiquing extrodanaire, Katey. Matt & Kevin for their support. Dave for drudging through my first draft with helpful and understanding hands. My co-creator Matt for the wealth ideas that pour from his head. I love you all!

    Reply
  31. Ellen B says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:11 pm

    My boyfriend, my mother, and my writing buddies, especially Adam, Suzy and Zoe, and all my writing buddies in Blogland.

    Reply
  32. JustineDell says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:15 pm

    Yes, my daughter. Eventhough she keeps me busy with her 'hobbies', she let's me have the slightest bit of time for mine. Thank you, Emily.

    ~JD

    Reply
  33. Scott says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:16 pm

    Gotta thank my mom for showing a genuine interest in my pursuit and reading everything I've ever written.

    Reply
  34. Rebecca Knight says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:20 pm

    Wonderful post, and so timely!

    To my dear husband, who is right now reading my 500th draft just to make sure it's PERFECT before I query. I'm sure he has some parts memorized by this point, but he always volunteers. You are the best, babe! Thank you for being my idea factory, my best supporter, and my first and last beta reader.

    Also, a huge thanks to my mom and grandma, who always believe in me and pray for me :). Also, thanks mom for the grammar advice! I would never know when to use that or which without you ;).

    Reply
  35. Amy says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:22 pm

    I need to thank my husband, Mike, & my 3 girls, Deanna, Evelyn, & Amelia, for their patience & inspiration, & for their general ability to get-along-without-me when needed.

    I also want to thank all those bloggers out there, & Verla Kay's Blue Boards & AW Water Cooler as well. Without all of you, I would never have learned as much about the business as I have. And I learn more & more every day.

    Reply
  36. Renee Collins says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:26 pm

    My twin sister.

    She is to me what Theo van Gogh was to Vincent.

    (Not that I'm comparing myself to Vincent van Gogh, but, well, you know what I mean.)

    Reply
  37. Molly H says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:26 pm

    Great idea!
    I send a huge bouquet of love to my husband, Jason for being a rock and my best, most passionate reader. Also for doing the dishes and picking up slack night after night so I can write.
    Also, to my two little ones, who keep me grounded in love, I bless them for their patience and their spirited support.
    And to my sister, Wendy, who pleaded for chapters as I revised them. She made that first book happen.
    Yay! Thanks Nathan!

    Reply
  38. Tracy Hahn-Burkett says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:28 pm

    My husband, who: kicked me in the butt by telling me seven years ago to "quit talking about writing and start doing it"; reads every single thing I write before it goes anywhere; listened to me talk out the main characters and key plot elements of my WIP (novel) for a year-and-a-half and helped me sharpen elements like conflict, etc., as I worked (he was an English Lit. major in college); supports me and our kids financially so that I can pursue my passion; puts up with my rapid-pace, roller coaster-style swings from despair to elation and back again regarding my ability to write a novel of the quality to which I aspire; offers confidence boosts when I really need them; and loves me through all of it.

    And thanks to my kids for providing such great material for my non-fiction and children's writing and for understanding, in the words of my then-six-year-old son, that "Mommy loves to write and write and write."

    Reply
  39. Lucinda Gunnin says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:28 pm

    My wonderful husband, who is also a writer, so he understands the statement, "Ooh, I have a great idea for a story!" and simply brings me food from time to time.

    And, all my loving online friends, writers and otherwise, who forgive me when i disappear for days on end.

    Reply
  40. Sarah Laurenson says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:35 pm

    I was sick this weekend and our Valentine's plans bit the dust. My wife is really amazing, supportive, loving. I owe her big.

    Reply
  41. Kristi says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:38 pm

    I couldn't ask for a more supportive hubby – he rocks! Also, thanks to my kiddos, siblings, friends, critique group members, blog readers, and fellow bloggers for being so awesome. I feel very fortunate to be surrounded by such great people! Thanks to you too Nathan for your wonderful blog. 🙂

    Reply
  42. Matt Heppe says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:39 pm

    My mom. She started me on this journey with a gift of The Hobbit many years ago. And my wife for her wonderful support.

    Reply
  43. ryan field says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:42 pm

    This post is certainly appropriate for anyone who has to live with a writer. They deserve all the appreciation they can get.

    Reply
  44. Jeff Hewitt says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:52 pm

    My wife has been my biggest supporter and best proof reader. Thank you, Megan.

    Reply
  45. Sara McClung ♥ says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:56 pm

    Oh God. My husband. He's amazing. When I started writing my novel, he believed in me SO much that he told me to quit my job so I could concentrate full time on writing.

    I'll start querying in a month or so, so we'll see how it pans out–but regardless of the end result, I will NEVER forget or stop appreciating his complete support 🙂

    Reply
  46. Malin says

    February 16, 2010 at 5:57 pm

    I think I would like to thank writing for putting out with me. I have few friends, no partner and a small family. Writing is a way for me not to suffocate, especially during a day such as Valentine.

    Writing allows me to dive into my characters and both love and be loved for a while. It's a precious thing.

    Reply
  47. T. Anne says

    February 16, 2010 at 6:01 pm

    Great post. I would love to thank my husband and children who appreciate the fact manipulating the twenty-six letters of the alphabet is more than just my sport.

    Reply
  48. Paul and Karen says

    February 16, 2010 at 6:06 pm

    Thanks to my husband who keeps me on track and brings me back home when I've traveled too far. And my girls, who write as well. They understand the worth of that shining moment when everything crystallizes, so they chill and get their own dinners some days. Love you guys!

    Reply
  49. Kayeleen says

    February 16, 2010 at 6:10 pm

    My husband. He's my sounding board, my inspiration, and my support. More often than I can count, he's been the one to say, "Why don't you go do some writing?" It's nice to know he thinks so highly of my efforts.

    Reply
  50. Abby Stevens says

    February 16, 2010 at 6:13 pm

    My husband, who let me quit my job (!!) two years ago to just write. I love him, I love what I do, I love life.

    https://www.thetabbycatt.blogspot.com

    Reply
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