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[blank] Are the New Vampires

November 5, 2009 by Nathan Bransford 276 Comments

Come on, you know you want to try it. Insert your own guess in the comments.

I’m going with fallen pirate apocalyptic ninja angels as the new vampire.

Filed Under: Genres Tagged With: Paranormal, You Tell Me

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Patricia Stoltey says

    November 6, 2009 at 8:12 pm

    Trolls are the new vampires.

    Reply
  2. carolynyalin says

    November 6, 2009 at 8:38 pm

    I see a return to old-school –

    Human anguished teenagers dealing with everyday life.

    Reply
  3. Kat Harris says

    November 6, 2009 at 8:41 pm

    Werewolves.

    Reply
  4. Brandi Schmidt says

    November 6, 2009 at 8:53 pm

    Wolverines that search out a meal by clawing & climbing from house to house, finding and devouring the poor souls that can’t pay the hefty town dues. Everyone fears the new moon. (Next MS?)

    Not my usually light-hearted lovesick side, thanks for bringing this out Nathan. Now I can’t stop thinking about vampires, zombies, and scary evil kittens.

    Reply
  5. Robert Michael says

    November 6, 2009 at 10:10 pm

    Malicious Malelovent Manatees. Or maybe Kelpies (Irish water spirits). Hey, I got dibs on that one…

    Reply
  6. Laurie Boris says

    November 6, 2009 at 10:55 pm

    Anorectic zombie sluts who can kill with their minds…but not with their hearts.

    Reply
  7. Lucinda says

    November 6, 2009 at 11:02 pm

    Mosquito Vampires

    Reply
  8. Peter Hoflich says

    November 7, 2009 at 2:45 am

    I see there have been a few votes for bankers, that's great. They are, after all, vampire squid. Vampire squid probably aren't the new vampires, but bankers are.

    Someone could actually take most of the mythical creatures mentioned in this blog and create a rambling absurd screenplay/novel/epic poem. Has anyone tried? Can we make it a contest?

    There are so many other things that could be vampires, though:

    – rock stars! look no further than Glen Danzig
    – zombie rock stars! look no further than Kurt Cobain (or an undead Glen Danzig; see Misfits song "Braineaters")
    – if nobody cares about rock stars, how about New York taxi drivers? they're coming to your town next
    – GIs (or ex-GIs)
    – the cartoon characters of our youth (Batmite, anyone?)
    – authors who write about sparkly vampires?

    We can have hours of fun with this one…

    Reply
  9. Melissa Petreshock says

    November 7, 2009 at 8:48 pm

    I may be a little late on this, but I just wanted to jump in and give my opinion. The new vampires are seemingly normal teenagers who have supernatural powers and are part of a subspecies of humans that safeguard our overall safety and peace. The of course are also friends with vampires and shape-shifters as well since they are all part of the supernatural underground life.

    Of course, I say this all because my well-liked self-published YA book is about this, although the vampires and shape-shifters aren't introduced until book two of the proposed series. Book two is my current WIP. You can find out all about it at http://www.melissapetreshock.com

    I also want to add that vampires have been popular for so long although Twilight brought them really front and center that I don't think vampires are going to be unpopular with the YA crowd anytime soon.

    Reply
  10. Cari says

    November 7, 2009 at 9:40 pm

    Amish witches who work at Wal-Mart on the weekends.

    Reply
  11. Nick F. says

    November 8, 2009 at 2:13 am

    Ninja Jedi Pirates are the new vampire

    Reply
  12. Anonymous says

    November 8, 2009 at 12:03 pm

    One-legged peaceful Muslim extremists

    Reply
  13. Linda Urban says

    November 8, 2009 at 3:51 pm

    Peanut vendors.
    Seriously. With all the nut allergy kids now in their teens?
    Plus the opportunity for double entendre?
    Lookout, Skippy. There's one behind you.

    Reply
  14. GhostFolk.com says

    November 8, 2009 at 6:51 pm

    A real boy meets a real girl and, uh, they talk.

    Reply
  15. Star Mama says

    November 8, 2009 at 8:58 pm

    It's not mothers with corny aliases who lose sleep writing blogs about raising children, being unemployed and taking odd jobs? Dang. Some day . . .

    Reply
  16. laura says

    November 9, 2009 at 12:07 am

    Pit Bulls Are the New Vampires.
    Both have received bad reputations from hysterical people!

    Reply
  17. L says

    November 9, 2009 at 7:17 am

    Your average, every day eighth grade girls + piles of voice + a level of self-centeredness that makes the sun feel mild to moderately insignificant are definitely the new vampires.

    Fo sho.

    I'm just sayin… magic and angels, and demons,and faeries and now even zombies are being beaten to death, or, you know, whatever you are if you're being beaten when already dead.

    Reply
  18. L says

    November 9, 2009 at 7:25 am

    Oh, and the Navajo Skin Walkers comment is totally gonna give me bad dreams AND freak me out the next time I'm driving at night.

    Dang you, Jacqui!!
    I forgot all about those.
    Those are the scariest hands down.

    Reply
  19. Julia says

    November 9, 2009 at 8:48 pm

    Homeless peoples, who are actually vampire/pirate/zombies.

    Reply
  20. VE says

    November 10, 2009 at 4:42 am

    I'm going with gnomes.

    – They like to travel
    – They already have movie experience (think Amelie)
    – They have corporate sponsorship (think Travelosity)
    – Their good at pranks
    – They fit into the overhead bin as a carry on

    Reply
  21. Icy says

    November 10, 2009 at 12:35 pm

    It'll be the centuries old battle between the evil were-ladybirds, and the kindly talking moths.

    Reply
  22. Pat says

    November 10, 2009 at 6:12 pm

    Forest rangers are the new vampires. There are going to be LOTS of novels about forest rangers coming out in the next five years. Just wait and see!

    Reply
  23. moirayoung says

    November 10, 2009 at 10:17 pm

    I will second the Penny Arcade comment, with a link to the comic:

    https://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2009/10/12/

    Reply
  24. Marie says

    November 11, 2009 at 7:31 am

    Steampunk all the way–maybe with fallen angels thrown into the mix. And witty teen criminal masterminds!

    Reply
  25. Deborah Alys Carter says

    November 14, 2009 at 2:44 pm

    Apparently, we were all wrong. Poor,illiterate and scratching out an existence in the ghetto is the new Vampire. Could this mean readers will prefer depressing reality to depressing fantasy?

    Reply
  26. Matthew says

    March 3, 2010 at 7:47 pm

    Has anyone seen this: Cowboy Viking Ninja?

    Reply
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