Confession time: I’m having a frustrating day. But hey, it completely goes with the territory. This is a frustrating business. There are more books than slots at publishing houses, and that’s the case now more than ever. Frustration happens. It’s the nature of life in the book funnel.
It’s also just built into the business. When you hear about a publisher jumping from $2.5 million to $3 million in an auction for a celebrity book, it’s easy to think, “Uh… that publisher just nickle and dimed my client and refused to give them even $1,000 more when they really deserved it. And they passed on another project because they didn’t want to take a risk on a debut. But they won’t even blink at jumping $500,000 in an auction for a book about Paris Hilton’s chihuahua?” (Okay, it is kind of a cute dog. Also I’m kidding, that’s not an actual book. Yet. UPDATE: Oops! Yes, it is.)
And then of course, there’s the aforementioned rejections, bad reviews, negativity, and strange whims of fate.
Depressed? Don’t be!
Here’s the only way to deal with the frustrations of the publishing business: don’t become fixated on the publishing business.
You’ll. Go. Mad. if you place all of your eggs in the basket of publishing, following the ins and outs, letting it consume your entire being, and living and dying by your rejections, reviews, and what mean anonymous commenters are saying about you on any given day.
It’s soooo easy to let publishing become an all-consuming force in your life. It takes so much time to write, and then there are the blogs to follow, the agents to research, the publishers to keep track of, the industry news, the rejections to track… it takes a lot of time. Combine that with a day job and there aren’t many hours in the day left.
But it just can’t be everything.
The best way to deal with the frustrations: ignore it for a while. Take a walk! Spend time with your friends and family! (Remember them? It’s okay to ask them to remind you what their names are. They’ll just be glad to have you back.). Take up a second, less frustrating hobby, like sunflower photography. Better yet: start rooting for the Sacramento Kings to see what frustration really feels like. The publishing industry has nothing on being a Kings fan.
If you find yourself becoming down in the dumps about your prospects or the business or the state of things: It’s probably a sign you’re spending too much time focused on it. It’s perfectly okay to tune out for a while. When you clear your head and come back: all of a sudden the industry will magically seem like a place of hope and possibility.
Because the difference between seeing opportunity and frustration in this business is all in your head. It’s just a matter of how your brain is looking at it that day.
Please share your favorite method of distraction in the comments section!
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Art: Ludwig Knaus – Mein Napf ist leer
Horserider says
There is nothing a good bowl of ice cream and some awesome music won’t solve. I plan to keep my fridge stocked with ice cream when I start querying. š In fact, I could use some now.
annerallen says
I play in the dirt. Plant something. Pull weeds. Gardening is about hope.
Corey Blake says
I like to have so many projects going on that bad news from one is always set off by brilliant news on other fronts. I used to have a sign up in my office that read, “What have you done to create good news today?” My goal used to be to create 10 opportunities for good news. As I have built my business I spread that mentality to my staff and literally any day, one piece of rejection about a project can be offset by 20 other small and large victories. Go Fishing!
superwench83 says
Acting.
It’s still like writing in that you’re following a plot and worried about character development, but it’s different enough that it’s a nice break from writing. And there’s an added benefit: When you finish the final draft of a novel, no one applauds and cheers. But when you put on a play, they do. And that’s a great feeling.
IQOkie says
When I’m not writing, I’m reading about writing. Or if the situation gets really ugly, I have to pull out the big guns and read my favorite humor authors–Garrison Keillor and David Sedaris–to remember what it feels like to laugh.
Jen says
When I get frustrated with the writing world, I eat chocolate. And write random death scenes for characters that are acting up. Haha.
Nikki Hootman says
I joined a writing group. Once a month, I get together with three other people who love language, the written word, and the act of writing. We critique each other honestly, but we also support one another and really look forward to seeing the next installation of each others’ stories. Knowing I have three intelligent people reading my words – and enjoying it! – always brings back the joy of writing anew.
StrugglingToMakeIt says
Music. And general craziness (i.e. spending time with my friends). I went to a Tokyo Police Club concert Tuesday that was insane and made me really happy. Ruby Coast and Ra Ra Riot were also there. Great times. Oh and law school…unfortunately, there’s always something to do for that…
Rachelle says
1. Go for a run with my awesomely amazing yellow lab.
2. Go to Body Combat at the gym (every bit as cathartic as it sounds).
3. Watch American Idol.
4. Eat chocolate.
5. Do #4 and #5 at the same time, AFTER doing #1 or #2.
B.J. Anderson says
The same way I deal with rejection: Chocolate and a treadmill.
Rick Daley says
Attn: Mr. Fuller,
Greetings from Columbus! With all due respect, I’m not sure frustration and despair scratch the surface of your woes as a Bengals fan ;-(
At least we have the Buckeyes whooping on the Wolverines consistently, something all Ohioans can be proud of.
WORD VERIFICATION: braties. Brats, but baby ones.
Ginger Simpson says
I do the cheapest thing I can think of–I dream. I pretend I just got a letter from Nathan Bransford, telling me he loves my latest submission and would love to represent me. No, in fact he begs to represent me. The whole bended knee things, you know. Then I wake up and go back to working on my manuscript. When I really get desperate, I watch reality TV shows and try to figure out how they pick such idiots to be on them… or tune in to Jerry Springer and verify that I really am much more intelligent than part of the human race.
Rick Daley says
Anon @ 11:43 (and anyone else who is interested)
You can visit the Public Query Slushpile at:
https://openquery.blogspot.com
I started it 1 week ago. So far 5 queries have been posted, and all 5 have received useful feedback.
Please visit, comment, and submit (if you dare).
Anonymous says
Yoga.
MaLanie says
I love that I am not the only person that runs to Chocolate! The COCO Bean Rocks!
BTW, who would buy a book about Hilton’s chihuahua? Seriously?
jil says
Music = maybe Phantom of the Opera – very loud so I can sing and dance with only my dog to watch. (Have his dog friends been giving me funny looks lately?) Music puts me in a different world.
A long walk or run in the hills with “Cappuccino” where everything is beautiful.
Friends who only talk about dog agility or running. No depressing talk allowed.
A green tea soy milk latte at Starbucks where I watch people and dream.
Then I go home and rewrite that damn query.
Bane of Anubis says
Rachel, I beg to differ w/ you on the Kings – dumping Clark, Jackson, and Jones was brilliant – overplayed and underperforming talent.
The Maloofs might not be Cuban-esque in their desire to win, but they’re close – they’ll do what they can to get a winning team, but they’ll do it prudently (and not Snyder-esquelly) – hopefully they can draw some big name FAs to SAC-town at some point.
writin'mama says
Well, let’s just say I don’t have time to be frustrated…….I was just lucky to finish my book; had I known that getting an agent would be so time consuming….well, who knows…..anyway, I work full time (English teacher), I have a three year old son and am about to have a daughter (due in June). So with each rejection that floats its way into my mailbox, I shrug and say to myself, “not this time.”…..but I’m far from giving up.
Courtney says
Nathan– your 49ers fandom has made my day.(I live in the big middle of Cowboys country…) And, seeing as it is midterms week, that is saying a lot!
As for distraction, I’m a full time English major and the manager/lead singer/guitarist of a semi-professional Bluegrass band. Did I mention my two day jobs?
Hah! you depressing rejection letters–just see if I have time to read you!
Rachel says
I respect your opinion, Bane of Anubis, but if I recall correctly…as soon as Peja and Bibby were back in the game that season, the team fell apart. However, when Clark, Jones, and Jackson were starting, they did awesome…
Anonymous says
I love you for this post. It is so true. It is what you make of it, allow yourself to make of it.
Thanks.
and the fact that YOU can say this, where there is no escape from publishing…..golly jeepers.
š
Beth Terrell says
Snuggle with my papillon, Luca, a shining little being of goodness and light. He makes my world a brighter place.
Anonymous says
talk about frus*tr*ting!
($%^&&%#*&)
(LIONS fan here…)
(Lions and Tigers and Bears…
oh no!)
Shannon says
Hope your evening goes better than your day Nathan, and that you can find some time to relax, have fun, and take a break from the day’s frustrations.
Thanks for the post. Reminders to relax and to put frustrations into perspective are always helpful.
Anonymous says
Boxing.
Not kick-boxing. Boxing boxing.
Free cell.
Music (loud).
Wandering randomly in the city.
Calvin Trillin.
Elegant fiction.
Ice cream.
Law & Order reruns.
Practical joke and prank fantasies.
Anonymous says
Okay, am a Michigan fan too, and with the new coach, …. (failure to launch)…
But here’s what I do: (or did):
bought furniture until I had no space left in the house.
stopped opening my mail until it covered all the furniture
collected tables
collected chairs
imaginary people sitting in chairs
covered chairs with lively fabric
tried my hand at casseroles (warning: do not visit during such periods)
get drunk with my best friend on the tele
drive to New Mexico or the Grand Canyon or the ocean in North Carolina (actually these things really work well)
(note: until the credit card runs over the limit)
Play with my wonderful doggy.
(Life could be a dream, shaboom, shaboom…)
Alps says
Kissing baby cheeks, definitely.
Don’t have baby cheeks to kiss? Sorry.
Mira says
Okay. Nathan I’m sorry you’ve had a frustrating day, but I really don’t think it will top my frustrating week.
You remember I was searching for guatemalan orphans to serenade you? In order to entice you to stop playing hard to get and send me that signing contract?
Well, I’m giving up. I’m sorry, but finding guatemalan orphans is just downright frustrating.
Here’s what I did. First, I tried the direct approach. I walked up to children on the street, gave them 20 bucks and asked them if they were guatemalan orphans. Well, evidentally mothers don’t like that. I know they don’t like that because my ears are still ringing from the screeching. And okay, fine. Grab your child and run, screaming at the top of your lungs for the police, but geez. At least give me my 20 bucks back.
So anyway, 300 bucks later, I finally gave up and did the next best thing. I posted an ad on craigslist asking for guatemalan orphans.
Well, it will probably surprise you to hear that this a bust too. I got all kinds of crazy responses. One guy was downright irritating. He kept saying: “Look. I’m an orphan. What does it matter if I’m from Mississpi rather than Guatemala?” I was very patient. I said: “Look. I can spell Guatemala. Nobody in the world can spell Mississipi.” He didn’t seem to get the logic. I can spell the rest of what he said, but I won’t, if you see what I mean.
There’s another good reason not to post an ad looking for orphans that will ‘sing’ for you. Did you know you can flag ads on craigslist? I do now.
I will say Homeland Security is very nice. I know Homeland Security is very nice because I spent 10 hours with them. They were very persuasive. Probably the most persuasive part was when they pointed out I don’t own a microphone or camera, so you wouldn’t even be able to hear the orphans sing.
But anyway, at least now you’re on some list at Homeland Security. That’s got to be a good thing, right, Nathan?
So, no guatemalan orphans. But I tried, Nathan, I really did. And think about it this way. This is the type of initiative and decisive action you would get to experience on a daily basis if we were in business together. Yes, I thought that would sweeten the pot. Yes, indeed.
Okey dokey. I’ll look for the signing contract in the morning.
That ought to do it.
Mira says
Oh sorry. I didn’t mean to disrupt the conversation. I’ve just had a tough week, and I figured Nathan was wondering where his orphans were.
Um, so to speak.
But please, don’t let me interrupt.
Marilyn Peake says
New distraction:
Fantastic trailer for “Watchmen”
dc says
Love this series by the way. Thanks for the sunshine! š
I disctract myself by reading great writing, cooking for my husband, and the occasional painting project.
Stef Kramer says
Read Deepak Chopra’s Seven Spiritual Laws of Success. Or play Operation with my son.
tammi says
Cheering on my kiddo during their b-ball games. Go Celtics! Go Storm!
Oh, and watching Sawyer…um, I mean LOST…every Wednesday night at 8.
Wanda B. Ontheshelves says
Since there are already 135 posts, and I'm going to assume all the Detroit Lions fans have already had their say, so they won't notice my posting this, and even if they did, they would just skip over it…but, I can't resist posting this link, which mentions the Detroit Lions & Detroit…
https://www.moltx.org/celebrate.html
I guess I'm just inspired because I started reading an essay a family member (GM employee) recently wrote, entitled: "THINKING DIFFERENTLY"
Go Detroit!
**the day's frustrations have melted away, imagine that**
Wanda B. Ontheshelves says
Hi Mira,
I am intrigued by your posts, self-referential (“conversation of one”) though they may be – have you considered writing a diary-like novel, one entry per day for 3 months say, and try and get that published? You’d have to calculate how much you’d have to write to get up to 60,000 words, or whatever the threshold for such a novel would be – I am reminded of some comic monologues (don’t ask me at this late hour to give names).
Just another writer,
Wanda B.
Mira says
Wanda, how encouraging. Thank you, that means alot to me.
I have a piece I’m working on that’s exactly like that – I just need to find the right character. The first character I chose was too annoying – I don’t think she could sustain a whole book. So, I need to find another one. Or maybe multiple characters? I don’t know. I have the voice and the concept, but not the character(s) yet.
I do have to say, though, that this really isn’t a one way conversation. Nathan is participating in his own way. If you close your eyes, you can hear it. Beyond the soft rustling of leaves, the swift whoosh of the wind, the lonely hooting of the blowfish, in the far background is the quiet scratch, scratch, scratch of a pen filling out a signing contract based on a halfway decent idea…for lots and lots and lots of money.
And that makes for a truly lovely conversation.
But back to you, Wanda, someone who is actually talking to me. Thanks, really, for the encouragment. I’d love to hear what you’re working on, too.
Bane of Anubis says
Awesome must be a relative term – perhaps against the Clippers. I’m not saying they can’t play, but nobody can win in the long run w/ players like that leading the way.
mkcbunny says
This was a great post. Thanks. Just getting away is a good thing.
Eva Ulian says
I became the Church photographer for the ceremony files archives: believe me there are a lot of ceremonies in the Church. Apart from that I am an impressionist painter, a translator, a researcher for an architect’s studio and love ballroom dancing. Life is never boring, but even with all that going on, my only true ambition is to hit the NY Times top selling list with my book that is not yet published.
Helen says
ahh, Nathan you’re the best; anxiety can ruin a writer, I think. Meals taste bad, sunny days go by unnoticed, partners suffer.
I like to go down to the beach and walk about with no shoes on. sand feels good, and the sound of waves crashing…ah bliss. Unfortunately, I don’t live anywhere near the sea at the moment. for others who do, please go and take advantage of the free therapy š
Mary says
Going round Museums and searching for the oldest object. There’s magic in the ancient days!
ash-krafton says
Bollywood. Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam is comfort food.
m. Swallow says
funny that you said “take up sunflower photography,” because that’s (sort of) exactly what i did recently. (photography, but not of sunflowers) i’m also deluding myself into thinking i might make a go as an art photographer.
but i’ve also just stepped away from writing for a bit…just resting the brain.
Alexa says
Another great post, I love the reminder that’s it’s all how you look at the world.
Best distractions are TV. Especially Gordan Ramsey shouting at people in Kitchen Nightmares. Makes me glad I’m not trying to become a chef! Surely no editor/reviewer can be as scary as Gordan!
PharmLibrarian says
I’m not real proud of this, but when writing/agent/publishing refuse to yield the foreground in my life, and it’s freezing out (northern clime), the best mental chewing gum is a zombie movie. Not: I did not say ‘good zombie movie’ as their charm tends to be the opposite of good…
Lucinda says
First, I light a candle. Then I pour a glass of wine. Finally, I clean house like crazy. When it is all finished, I write and write and write some more.
Actually, I use rejection, criticism, and “setbacks” as tools to learn. They help me to focus on refining my writing by giving me new perspectives. Without it, I would think that I was perfect when I am far from it.
Dana M. Baird says
Thank you for this post, Nathan. It is a nice reminder for those of us trying to eke out careers in the small press world.
Chumplet - Sandra Cormier says
I watch the Leafs slip into the Eastern Conference basement and thank my lucky stars I’m not a hockey player in Toronto.
Alle Hall says
I go hang out with my children — and remember what is really important. Taking their worlds seriously always puts mine into persepctive.
Marilyn Peake says
Mira,
You have a talent for writing. Just keep on writing!