New Year Reminders

Last night’s Bachelor: not over it. Barely able to discuss. We’d better move on. Um. Not that I watched it.

It’s come to my attention that this blog has been nominated for something called a Weblog Award! If you feel inclined to vote for this blog or for one of the other (more deserving) nominees for Best Literature Blog, you can do so here. You can vote every day if you are stranded on a desert island with only a laptop to entertain you.

It’s a New Year, we’re soon to have a new president, and with all the new stuff I thought it might be helpful to remember some old stuff. Here are some New Year reminders on general etiquette (Colleen Lindsay also has a refresher on her guidelines here).

Curtis Brown agent Emilie Jacobson requested that I ask that people kindly stop sending e-queries that state “Here’s a link to my query and bio: https://MissSnarkWouldKillYouForThis.com” Agents do not like clicking on strange links! Sometimes they bite. Plus it wastes time. It’s fine to include a link to your website at the bottom of your e-mail, but anything you really want the agent to see should go in the body of the e-mail.

Please do not call agencies for submission information. If you can find it online: go by that. If not: guess. The default is (still) to send a query letter with a self-addressed stamped envelope through the mail unless you see otherwise. Agents of the world thank you.

Meanwhile, I’m still getting a mystifying number of e-mailed queries professing that they’ve included a self-addressed stamped envelope in the e-mail. I’m still puzzling out the physics.

Please don’t ask if it’s ok to send a query. Just send it.

Formatting your query: Don’t. Touch. Anything. Don’t touch the fonts, don’t choose the “Insert Bunny” option in the File menu, don’t center your name, don’t make the background look like clouds, don’t indent, don’t change the color to fuchsia, don’t attach anything. Just open it up, type it out, and click send. Trust me.

And remember, friends don’t let friends begin queries with rhetorical questions.