Me at 8:36 Pacific Time.
Nathan Bransford | Writing, Book Editing, Publishing
Helping authors achieve their dreams
Nathan Bransford
Helping authors achieve their dreams
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Nice Macbook Pro. 😀
Nathan, a side question if you will…please?
Us newbies hear that our first novel should be 100,000 words, agent query says 80 to 100,000.
how do we know what is right or what is wrong, is there a magic #, or formula? thanks for your time.
laurel-
Actually it’s a PowerBook G4 with more dents than used pick up truck, but I definitely love it. We’ve been through quite a few queries and partials, this old computer and me.
anon-
I’m not really a word-count stickler, so you’re asking the wrong guy. I always say, if it works it works.
thanks, for the time to answer my stupid question.
Gotta love a Mac…
Anyway, regarding the photo, that are you eating? More to the point, drinking? Looks like the hard stuff, man. I imagine you’re prepping for reading all those graphs, lol! You have your job cut out for you. 8^)
Nathan,
Chinese food, donuts and Captain Morgan’s! That is a power dinner! After opening up the floodgates might I suggest a bottle of Tums on the side?
Cheers!
Captain Morgan?
Nathan, you seriously need to be bribed by an Australian. Preferably a Queenslander. Bribe of choice, Bundaberg Rum. For a competition like this, only a 40oz square bear will do.
Captain Morgan. You are ruining your image. Sigh.
Ozal-
Believe me, this isn’t typical behavior (I prefer bourbon), but sometimes you have to make do with what you got.
Yeah, I know it. That’s how I came to discover how dreadful Captain Morgan is…
(I’d routinely send Bundy with query letters, but I suspect it wouldn’t make it past customs. And I mean leaving Aus, not entering the US!)
Ozal-
Now THAT’S what I call a query letter.
one of these things is not like the other…..half eaten hostess donut…..chocolat, msg and booze, long night?
Would some adulation and grovelling gratitude help make it better?
*grovel, grovel*
*genuflect*
You are awesome, Nathan.
♥
So now you’re the pirate agent?
It’ll take more than one bottle to get you through the paragraph entries, however.
A bottle of rum and a plate of unidentifiable food…I’m getting a hangover just looking at this.
Hahahhha! Great pic Nathan.
LOL, great pic. Bourbon is better, indeed. The important thing is to avoid gin, to distinguish yourself from Miss Snark.
Good luck with this great contest!
Don’t listen to all the anti Captain Morgan comments. My respect for you went up when I saw the bottle.
Hi Nathan,
New to your blog, although I check your posts over at AW. Heard about your contest and thought I’d give it a go. Good luck getting through all of the entries – you may need more Captain Morgan.
JJ
Now we know it’s gin for Miss Snark and bourbon for Nathan…. if only I ran an ABC store, I’m sure I’d have an agent by now! 😉
It’s obvious (from the orange graphic on your computer) that you’re only pretending to read the entries.
🙂
Okay, maybe I do feel a little sorry for you. A little….
It’s only Tuesday morning, and there are 207 posts…not counting myspace, which I assume you’re including again too.
Dude, you’re gonna need more liquor.
Do we get to vote on our favorite paragraphs? I like gerri’s. “…we haven’t had a backed-up loo since we left base.”
P.S. Nice computer.
“Actually it’s a PowerBook G4 with more dents than used pick up truck, but I definitely love it. We’ve been through quite a few queries and partials, this old computer and me.”
As some one who’s just had to say goodbye to my darling G3 Powerbook (Mac Black) I wish you many long years with your dented pick up truck of a computer!
(Is the rum there for enjoyment or toleration?)
Ha! So now we know how agents really live! The myth is true!
That is a great pic. Still laughing.
Bourbon, eh?
The worst bourbon I ever drank was Jeremiah Weed.
It was basically done on a dare by a girlfriend of mine. Four of us were partying back home the night before Thanksgiving when the bar we were at closed, it was still early so we sought another watering hole.
We found a dive.
Lori spotted the label of Jeremiah Weed on the mirrored shelf behind the bartender and gave an audible groan.
So we all had to try some, just to see how bad it was.
It lived up to her billing.
Oh, and for some reason we decided to test out its flammability. Not only did the shot of Jeremiah Weed burn like sterno, but the residue clinging inside the shot glass burned as well.
Nasty. Of course maybe setting it on fire before drinking it negatively impacted the taste.
Anyway, have fun with your contest.
Linda
Hey, at least our boy is eating!
I was hoping for a follow-up contest like this. It’s really a great opportunity to see a multitude of different writers and their styles.
Thanks Nathan
church lady-
Actually that picture wasn’t staged. My fiancee looked at me said, “Um, someone should take a picture of you right now.” That someone was her.
So that’s what millionaire agents have for dinner. Hmmm… Nathan -The Captain Morgan doesn’t bother me – though I prefer Bushmills or Jameson Irish Whiskey – but you’re gonna hafta take a trip down here to Florida for some fresh caught shrimp (the size of your hand), some Mahi (blackened is best), & some artery clogging Hush Puppies!!! Me n’ Josephine & Isak from these parts could hook you & your fiancee’ up with some real food (with the promise that we won’t wave a MS in front of you). FWA conference is in November – great time of year for a visit! The contest is awesome – lots of great entries. Thanks for putting yourself through it all again.
Jaxpop! Count me in! But don’t be too surprised if I “just happen” to leave a few MS pages under Nate’s plate of seafood! lol
Donald Maass is gonna be ambushed by me when he does an all day workshop in Bonita Springs in Jan.
Enjoy the FWA con.! Me? I gotta work on term papers. 🙁
jaxpop and josephine-
Actually, the photo in my profile was taken at Toucan’s in Mexico Beach, FL (and I’m wearing a t-shirt from the Piggly Wiggly in Apalachicola). I’m a big fan of southern food! My arteries? Not so much.
jaxpop,
Don’t forget pompano and blue crab, some of the best Florida seafood fare, with a nice, ice cold glass of anejo rum…
Dang. Just when I start believing the myth that agents don’t make any money, I see this picture. I’ll bet you even buy your TV Guide off the newstand, too, eh?
dead man walking-
Was it the cheap liquor that tipped you off? The leftover Chinese food? The three year old beat up computer?
The pumpkins?
Mmmmmm…. mashed potatoes.
Hey, that’s my computer! The dent is on the left front corner.
None of the above – I think it was the donuts you were ignoring. Your posture in the picture makes you look like you eat them so often, you don’t even know you’re doing it. Eventually, I suspect you reached for another (with eyes fixated on your blog) and your hand grabbed an empty wrapper.
Anyone who blows through donuts like that is never going to have any extra moolah for sailing trips to Catalina. You need to buy the boxes of donuts. Sure, they go stale faster, but they cost less per pound.
Carrie brushes her hair out of her eyes as she looks towards the tree line. she thinks back to the day she was taken to the darkness. In all her nightmares she never thought one would actually happen to her. Her body bears the scars from that fateful night when her innocense was so savagely taken from her. She looks up the sky as the breeze continues to blow. She closes her eyes and lets out a shallow sigh. Her nightmare is over and she must begin again.